Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 10)

Sweating like a whore in church.

Miscellaneous

She’s lost as last years Easter egg.

Miscellaneous

Castration – The Advantages and the Disadvantages

Miscellaneous

It's coming up a cloud.

Miscellaneous

Doesn’t have a pot to piss in

Miscellaneous

Right as rain.

Miscellaneous

He wants the earth and the moon with two strands of bob wire around it – and it white washed.

Miscellaneous

Lay out… (of work/school)

Miscellaneous

What in the Sam Hill are you doing?

Miscellaneous

Plum tuckered

Miscellaneous

Looks like he’s been chewin’ tobacco and spittin’ in the wind.

Miscellaneous

He acts like he is 10 feet tall and bullet proof.

Miscellaneous

You know one thing that will really make a woman mad?… just run up and kick her in the butt. (P.S. This also works with men.)

Miscellaneous

Like a buzzard in a tree waiting for a mule to die

Miscellaneous

If you want to be the most popular person in your class, whenever the professor pauses in his lecture, just let out a big snort and say “How do you figger that!” real loud. Then lean back and sort of smirk.

Miscellaneous

My grandfather invented the cold air balloon… but it never really took off.

(1964 – ) English comedian
Miscellaneous Wordplay

It’s cold enough to freeze a turkey off the roost.

Miscellaneous

He’s so mean a rattlesnake bit him five times and died.

Miscellaneous

A guilty dog barks the loudest.

Miscellaneous

Busier than a cross eyed cranberry picker.

Miscellaneous

About half.

Angelo Giuseppe Roncalli (1881 – 1963) Italian pope
Miscellaneous