Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 12)

You need to count your fingers after shaking hands with him.

Miscellaneous

I’m gonna have a ‘Come to Jesus’ meeting with him.

Miscellaneous

I was born on a Friday, but not last Friday.

Miscellaneous

This ain't my first rodeo.

Miscellaneous

I think it should be a law that if you ever get sucked up into a tornado, whatever you can grab with your hands while you’re swirling around up there, you get to keep.

Miscellaneous

I think there probably should be a rule that if you’re talking about how many loaves of bread a bullet will go through, it’s understood that you mean lengthwise loaves; otherwise, it makes no sense.

Miscellaneous

Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won’t help.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)
Clothing Life Miscellaneous

You look like death eating a cracker.

Miscellaneous

Full of piss and vinegar

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I’m fair to middlin’.

Miscellaneous

Ten pounds of potatoes in a five pound sack

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Medicine makes people ill, mathematics make them sad, and theology makes them sinful.”

(1483 – 1546) German monk, Catholic priest & professor of theology
Miscellaneous

Shaking like a dog shitting peach seeds.

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He's busier than a cat with two tails.

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He was grinnin' like a possum eatin' briars.

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Marta says the interesting thing about fly-fishing is that it's two lives connected by a thin strand. Come on, Marta, grow up.

Miscellaneous

Were you raised in a barn?

Miscellaneous

A daily festival of human suffering.

American professional road racing cyclist
Miscellaneous

To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there’s no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other.

Miscellaneous

He’d complain if you hung him with a new rope.

Miscellaneous

It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.

Miscellaneous