Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 15)

When you die, if you get a choice between going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven; It might be a trick, but if it’s not, mmmm, boy.

Miscellaneous

What happens to the hole when the cheese is gone?

(1898 – 1956) German poet, playwright & theater director
Miscellaneous

Bigger’n Dallas

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Protected: Secret Cookie Recipe

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Well, slap my head and call me silly.

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… like a turd in the punchbowl

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Sorry as a two dollar watch.

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This likker is just right; if it’d been any worse, I couldn’t have drunk it; if it’d been any better, you wouldn’t have give it to me.

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I already know I’m going to hell, I’m just paving the road.

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Don't sneeze behind a skittish horse.

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She’s cuter than a bug’s ear.

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Avon In The Amazon

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Let me be the first to tweet about the 2018 earthquake.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician
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He ain't sawing logs, he's clearing brush.

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I’m fixin' to run over to the bank.

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Cute as a sack full of puppies.

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I have to laugh when I think of the first cigar, because it was probably just a bunch of rolled-up tobacco leaves.

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… since Christ left Cleveland!

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Just cause trouble comes visiting doesn't mean you have to offer it a place to sit down.

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Tall hog at the trough

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He can get glad the same way he got mad, or else he's gon' die unhappy.

Miscellaneous