Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 17)

A daily festival of human suffering.

American professional road racing cyclist
Miscellaneous

I'm out like a fat girl stealing second.

Miscellaneous

Speed Limit Enforced by Sniper

Miscellaneous

I have to laugh when I think of the first cigar, because it was probably just a bunch of rolled-up tobacco leaves.

Miscellaneous

That dog won't hunt.

Miscellaneous

Sittin’ on the amen corner

Miscellaneous

That kid could break an anvil.

Miscellaneous

Her breath/body odor would knock a buzzard off a shit wagon.

Miscellaneous

Everybody’s in the same pew

Miscellaneous

If Pigs Had Wings

Miscellaneous

Meaner than a snake

Miscellaneous

When Satan goes ice skatin’ in Hell.

Miscellaneous

That's like putting a side saddle on a boar hog!

Miscellaneous

Give a 50 cent answer for a nickel question.

Miscellaneous

Let me hug your neck.

Miscellaneous

Give a man a fish and it will feed him for a day, give the man a fishing rod and he will sell it for more fish, or burn it for firewood.

(1968 – ) English impressionist & comedian
Miscellaneous Proverbs

I bet a funny thing about driving a car off a cliff is, while you’re in midair, you still hit those brakes.

Miscellaneous

I had a survey done on my house; eight out of 10 people said they really rather liked it.

(1972 – ) Anglo-Irish comedian, writer & actor
Miscellaneous

Don’t keep reaching for the stars because you’ll just look like an idiot stretching that way for no reason.

(1974 – ) American comedian, actor, producer & television host
Miscellaneous

He acts like he is 10 feet tall and bullet proof.

Miscellaneous

You ain’t worth a plug nickel.

Miscellaneous