Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 2)

He’s three limbs up a willa.

Miscellaneous

I wish I had a dollar for every time I spent a dollar, because then, Yahoo!, I’d have all my money back.

Miscellaneous

She could ruin a two-car funeral.

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Give a 50 cent answer for a nickel question.

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He ran like his feet were on fire and his ass was catchin'.

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I think the movie actually made my heart beat slower.

American movie critic
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He looks like something the cat drug in and the dog wouldn't eat.

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When I was a baby I had no teeth, I couldn't get a job and I couldn't eat meat.

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If Alien was my friend, I'd like to be with him when he went to the dentist. When they started drilling, he'd probably go nuts and start eating everybody. That Alien!

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I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is they don’t want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff, then, when somebody comes up, act like they just woke up and go, “What was THAT?!”

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The only hope of deciphering her invitations, someone said, was to pin them up on the wall and run past them!

(1907 – 1999) English publisher & editor
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That's like putting a side saddle on a boar hog!

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Pretty as you please

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She’s got more than one mule in her stable.

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He was so slick he could steal the sweet from sugar without touching a grain

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He took in a lot of mules.

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Sip 'N See

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Does a bear shit in the woods?

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What’s the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom? … A pickpocket snatches watches.

(1922 – 1991) American comedian
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One thing a computer can do that most humans can’t is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse.

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Fixments

Miscellaneous