Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 24)

Thank God it wasn’t his prostate.

(1884 – 1980) author & wit
Miscellaneous

If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never tried before.

Miscellaneous Proverbs

Like a dose of salts through a widow woman.

Miscellaneous

He's three days older than Moses.

Miscellaneous

Leader Of The Laundromat

Miscellaneous

Crookeder than a dog’s hind leg.

Miscellaneous

Let me be the first to tweet about the 2018 earthquake.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician
Miscellaneous

I expect them to come out… oh dear, I’d better not say fighting, had I?

Welsh football player, manager & coach
Miscellaneous

Presidential ambition is a disease which can only be cured by embalming fluid.

(1903 – 1963) U.S. senator (Tennessee)
Miscellaneous

Time to paint your butt white and run with the antelope.

Miscellaneous

Even a blind hog finds an acorn now and then.

Miscellaneous

It’s too bad cowboys didn’t eat much pizza back in the old west, because I think a good painting would be a cowboy giving his last slice to his horse.

Miscellaneous

Just cause trouble comes visiting doesn't mean you have to offer it a place to sit down.

Miscellaneous

Busted two sets of knee caps

Miscellaneous

Killer Pancake

Miscellaneous

If you chase two rabbits, you will not catch either one.

Miscellaneous

Of all the wonders of nature, a tree in summer is perhaps the most remarkable; with the possible exception of a moose singing 'Embraceable You' in spats.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Miscellaneous

He has enough money to burn a wet mule.

Miscellaneous

If you can't beat ‘em join ‘em, and if you can’t join ‘em beat ‘em.

Miscellaneous

Strong as a new well rope

Miscellaneous

It’s easy to sit and scoff at an old man’s folly… but also, check out his Adam’s apple!

Miscellaneous