Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 24)

He's as happy as if he had good sense.

Miscellaneous

More than plenty

Miscellaneous

Sometimes life seems like a dream… especially when I look down and see that I forgot to put on my pants.

Miscellaneous

Drunk as Cooter Brown

Miscellaneous

Happier 'n a puppy with two peters.

Miscellaneous

I organized my stuff and put it in boxes… then I put labels on each of the boxes; now I have a box full of razor blades labeled “Plan B.”

American comedian
Miscellaneous

I hope that someday we will be able to put away our fears and prejudices and just laugh at people.

Miscellaneous

I’ll Marry You Tomorrow (But Let’s Honeymoon Tonite)

Miscellaneous

I’m fixin' to run over to the bank.

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If you want to fight me you better pack a lunch and bring a flashlight.

Miscellaneous

He could go bear hunting with a switch.

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He was so fat it was easier to go over top of him than around him.

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Toward the end of the Stone Age I bet there was already a feeling that metal was just around the corner.

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He has a heart of gold… only harder.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Miscellaneous

Busier than a cross eyed cranberry picker.

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I have my doubts about disbelief.

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I guess we were all guilty, in a way; we all shot him, we all skinned him, and we all got a complimentary bumper sticker that said, “I helped skin Bob.”

Miscellaneous

Slow as Christmas

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She's so sweet, sugar wouldn't melt in her mouth.

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Hearing nuns’ confessions is like being stoned to death with popcorn.

(1965 – ) film & television actor
Miscellaneous

She’s about a half a bubble off plumb.

Miscellaneous