Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 29)

Don’t jus’ stand there with yer fanger in yer mouth!

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Well, shut my mouth.

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Children need encouragement: if a kid gets an answer right, tell him it was a lucky guess. That way he develops a good, lucky feeling.

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The bell cow

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Breast baby

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Peter Marshall: Liberace has a new book out called The Things I…?

Paul Lynde: Put in my hair.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
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Chester drawers

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Just because there is a rat in the barn doesn’t mean you need to burn it down.

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What are all these “other dimensions” I keep hearing about? … to me, there’s only one dimension worth anything, and that’s the good ole U.S. of A.

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Road Humps

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A face like a robber’s dog!

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It’s got tits or tires, you’re gonna have trouble with it.

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A hangdog look

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It is fun to be in the same decade with you.

(1882 – 1945) 32nd U.S. president
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That man ain't got the decency to die.

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I wish to my never.

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Sloppier than two pigs in a bucket

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I’ve been in Who’s Who, and I know what’s what, but it’ll be the first time I ever made the dictionary.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
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Braggin’ dog

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What makes Teflon stick to the pan?

(1946 – ) American comedian
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Southwest Airlines is like my period: it hurts my back and it’s always late.

(1982 – ) American actress & comedian
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