Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 3)

Does a snake have hips?

Miscellaneous

She looked like death eating a cracker.

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A face like a robber’s dog!

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Never hit a baby… even if they start it.

Canadian-American comedian & writer
Miscellaneous

I’m on it like cheese on grits!

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He's got both feet in the trough.

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Either fish or cut bait.

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She’s so ugly she has to sneak up on a glass of water to get a drink.

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I wish to my never.

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Infinity Welcomes Careful Drivers

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If you ever feel like you’re on the verge of a nervous breakdown, just follow these simple rules: first, calm down; second, come over and wash my car; third, shine all my shoes; there, isn’t that better?

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She's got mud all over her from bum hole to breakfast time.

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Tight as Dick’s hatband

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If the Lord’s willing and the creeks don’t rise.

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So tight you can hear him squeak when he walks

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In the marble orchard.

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Everybody’s in the same pew

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I had an argument with one of the seven dwarfs… he wasn’t happy.

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Chew the bark off

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I hope I never have to use my underpants as a flag, because after that I could never let my underpants touch the ground

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Old as dirt

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