Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 30)

Pretty as you please

Miscellaneous

It's so hot that it makes me want to take off my skin and sit in my bones.

Miscellaneous

It’s raining pitchforks and plowhandles.

Miscellaneous

I’m a psychic amnesiac… I know in advance what I’ll forget.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Miscellaneous

She couldn't keep her dress down.

Miscellaneous

He is ten pounds of shit in a five pound bag.

Miscellaneous

Marta was watching the football game with me when she said, “You know most of these sports are based on the idea of one group protecting its territory from invasion by another group.”
Yeah, I said, trying not to laugh. Girls are funny.

Miscellaneous

He's only got one oar in the water.

Miscellaneous

They say no one knows if we all see red the same way… except traffic cops.

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian, television writer/producer & radio host
Miscellaneous

Once I beat up the school bully with a baseball bat; both his arms were completely broken, which is what gave me the courage to do it.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Miscellaneous

Give down the country.

Miscellaneous

Within a lash

Miscellaneous

My poor fellow, why not carry a watch.

(1852 – 1917) English actor & theater manager
Miscellaneous

Grace the table.

Miscellaneous

The bathtub was invented in 1850 and the telephone in 1875 … In other words, if you had been living in 1850, you could have sat in the bathtub for 25 years without having to answer the phone.

(1902 – 1982) American professional baseball executive & club owner
Miscellaneous Things

I'm so hungry, my stomach is gnawing on my backbone!

Miscellaneous

He went after it whole hog.

Miscellaneous

She came down the road like a Tennessee Walker.

Miscellaneous

Does a snake have hips?

Miscellaneous

Can’t the Marx Brothers be arrested and maybe even tortured for all the confusion and problems they’ve caused?

Miscellaneous

The Atlanta Hawks are a bunch of guys who would prefer to pass kidney stones than pass a basketball.

American basketball coach
Miscellaneous