Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 33)

Warning to all outer-space guys: you can capture me and put me in your “space zoo” if you like, but I will sit way in the back of my cage, where it’s hard to see me; and when I do come out, I won’t be wearing any pants.

Miscellaneous

You might as well play Hob with the hoe-handle!

Miscellaneous

Warning to all outer-space guys: you can capture me and put me in your space zoo if you like, but I will sit way in the back of my cage, where it’s hard to see me… and when I do come out, I won’t be wearing any pants.

Miscellaneous

You'd have to be William Tell to hit a straw bale round here.

British motorcycle road racer
Miscellaneous

When I was a child, there were times when we had to entertain ourselves.; and usually the best way to do that was to turn on the TV.

Miscellaneous

Full as a tick

Miscellaneous

She’s got tongue enough for 10 rows of teeth.

Miscellaneous

“I’ve grown fat on the contents of charity packages,” said Tom carefully.

Miscellaneous

Congratulations to Martin Luther King Jr. for having the only dream in history anyone actually wanted to hear about.

American comedian
Miscellaneous

I was Caesarean born; you can’t really tell, although whenever I leave a house, I go out through the window.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Miscellaneous Self

Shet [shut] the light.

Miscellaneous

I'm like that guy who single-handedly built the rocket & flew to the moon. What was his name? Apollo Creed?

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Miscellaneous Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

He has to sneak up on water fountain to get a drink.

Miscellaneous

One thing a computer can do that most humans can’t is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse.

Miscellaneous

His face was all plowed up

Miscellaneous

To get clear water, go to the head of the branch.

Miscellaneous

It’s been saucered and blowed.

Miscellaneous

I don’t know her from Adam’s house cat.

Miscellaneous

Caught with your pants down.

Miscellaneous

Klaus Toppmoller: hair like David Gower and dress sense like Austin Powers.

British sports announcer
Miscellaneous

The worst misfortune that can happen to an ordinary man is to have an extraordinary father.

Miscellaneous