Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 34)

Take a slack

Miscellaneous

Every old crow thinks hers are the blackest.

Miscellaneous

Fee. Fi. Fo. Meh.

writer, editor & film reviewer
Miscellaneous

She is pretty as a pumpkin and about half as smart.

Miscellaneous

Unfortunately, all Coach Carter taught me was that I can actually scratch the first four verses of Revelations into the back of a theater chair with my fingernail in a little under two hours.

(movie reviews at mrcranky.com)
Miscellaneous Reviews/Criticism

Crying like a pine knot in a sawmill.

Miscellaneous

If they ever build a statue of me, I hope they don’t have me with my mouth wide open and holding a sign that says “I love rotten eggs.”

Miscellaneous

It’s raining so hard the animals are starting to pair up.

Miscellaneous

He’s dumber than owl shit.

Miscellaneous

If you were a poor Indian with no weapons, and a bunch of Conquistadors came up to you and asked where the gold was, I don’t think it would be a good idea to say, “I swallowed it… so sue me.”

Miscellaneous

Rest your features

Miscellaneous

There are no requests for jugglers – only ‘Don’t juggle!’

Miscellaneous

I was born on a Friday, but not last Friday.

Miscellaneous

Between you me and the gatepost…

Miscellaneous

Strong as a new well rope

Miscellaneous

Boy, ain't no difference twixt them and you 'cept God's Love.

Miscellaneous

I was sad, because I had no shoes, until I met a man that had no feet; so, I took his shoes, cuz hey, he wan’t using them!

Miscellaneous

He’s not wrapped too tight.

Miscellaneous

Faster than a knife fight in a phone booth.

Miscellaneous

He bought a pig in a poke.

Miscellaneous

One bad thing about Lassie, she was always warning you about something; let me be surprised for a change.

Miscellaneous