Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 4)

A Boy Named Sue

Miscellaneous

Take a slack

Miscellaneous

Shut the light.

Miscellaneous

About half.

Angelo Giuseppe Roncalli (1881 – 1963) Italian pope
Miscellaneous

If life gives you a bowl of lemons, go find an annoying guy with paper cuts.

Miscellaneous

Never laugh at a man, until you have walked a mile in his shoes; then you are a mile away, and you have his shoes.

Miscellaneous

I wish the first word I ever said was the word “quote,” so right before I die I could say “unquote.”

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Miscellaneous

After I die, wherever my spirit goes, I’m going to try to get back and visit my skeleton at least once a year, because, “Hey, old buddy, how’s it going?”

Miscellaneous

Energizer Bunny arrested… charged with battery.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Miscellaneous

Sweating like a whore in church.

Miscellaneous

Air up your car

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A mule can’t help it if his daddy is a jackass.

Miscellaneous

As you will no doubt have foreseen…

(1946 – ) English media executive & newspaper editor
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Madder than’ a wampus cat

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Jump the broomstick

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I’ll wear you out till your hide won’t hold shucks.

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It's been hotter'n a goat's butt in a pepper patch.

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He couldn't hit the broad side of a barn.

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Hotter than the hinges of Hell.

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Road Humps

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I’m goin’ to be on you quicker than a duck on a June bug.

Miscellaneous