Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 41)

Looks like he’s been chewin’ tobacco and spittin’ in the wind.

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Isn’t it funny how whenever a party seems to be winding down at somebody’s house, you can always keep it going just by talking a lot and eating and drinking whatever’s left?

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Penny: Just you wait and see. I’m gonna romance your freakin’ ass off.

Leonard: That’s beautiful. Is that Shakespeare?

(1975 – ) American actor
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The fool’s so lost he don’t know if he’s afoot or on horseback.

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She's got mud all over her from bum hole to breakfast time.

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It’s too bad cowboys didn’t eat much pizza back in the old west, because I think a good painting would be a cowboy giving his last slice to his horse.

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Well I’ll be John Brown.

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I had an argument with one of the seven dwarfs… he wasn’t happy.

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Tight as Dick’s hatband

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It’s so good, it makes you want to slap your momma!

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A little pain never hurt anyone.

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In weightlifting, I don't think sudden, uncontrolled urination should automatically disqualify you.

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It’s got tits or tires, you’re gonna have trouble with it.

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Drunk as Cooter Brown

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I guess if I was starving to death I would eat a dog… but not a collie, because I don’t like the taste of collie.

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If he had a brain and was a bird, he’d fly backwards.

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If you can paint a really good picture of a cow, you don’t have to write the word “cow” under it.

(1896 – 1985) U.S. senator (North Carolina)
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She’s lost as last years Easter egg.

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When you’re riding in a time machine way far into the future, don’t stick your elbow out the window, or it’ll turn into a fossil.

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For the record, folks; I never took a shit on stage and the closest I ever came to eating shit anywhere was at a Holiday Inn buffet in Fayetteville, North Carolina.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director
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A lot of times when you first start out on a project you think: this is never going to be finished, but then it is, and you think: Wow, it wasn’t even worth it.

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