Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 44)

I’m not sure I want to get the nickname “The Love Machine,” because how does that affect my nickname now, which is “The Lawn-Cutting Machine?”

Miscellaneous

So tight you can hear him squeak when he walks

Miscellaneous

Spent the last 3 days, alone, trying to learn escapology… I need to get out more.

(1980 – ) English magician & comedian
Miscellaneous Wordplay

Hay is just the first stage of bullshit.

Miscellaneous

Long as a month of Sundays.

Miscellaneous

Ducktown,  Tennessee

Miscellaneous

The water won’t clear till you get the hogs out of the creek.

Miscellaneous

That brush was so thick a dog couldn't bark in it.

Miscellaneous

You could grow potatoes in those dirty ears.

Miscellaneous

He’s so mean a rattlesnake bit him five times and died.

Miscellaneous

Our humility is what makes us great.

(1937 – 2014) American co-host of radio show “Car Talk”
Miscellaneous

Mites don’t fly this time of the year.

Miscellaneous

The Thing

Miscellaneous Song Titles

Basket name

Miscellaneous

After such an introduction, I can hardly wait to hear what I’m going to say.

(1909 – 1977) British journalist
Miscellaneous

I wish to my never.

Miscellaneous

As welcome as a skunk at a lawn party

Miscellaneous

They ate supper before they said grace.

Miscellaneous

Any man, in the right situation, is capable of murder, but not any man is capable of being a good camper… so, murder and camping are not as similar as you might think.

Miscellaneous

You'll go to hell for lyin' just as fast as fer stealin' chickens.

Miscellaneous

If you ever feel like you’re on the verge of a nervous breakdown, just follow these simple rules: first, calm down; second, come over and wash my car; third, shine all my shoes; there, isn’t that better?

Miscellaneous