Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 48)

Her apron’s ridin’ high.

Miscellaneous

Sweating like a whore in church.

Miscellaneous

Creaking doors hang the longest.

Miscellaneous

Within a lash

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Like three feet up a bull’s ass

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Tougher than a one-eared alley cat.

Miscellaneous

I’ve always been bad at spelling – not sure whether it’s nature or nurture.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Miscellaneous

Life is simpler when you plow around the stumps.

Miscellaneous

I don’t pay him no nevermind.

Miscellaneous

I dream of moving to India, or Pakistan, and becoming a cabdriver.

(1969 – ) comedian & actor
Miscellaneous

A face like a boiled fist

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It's cold enough to freeze the balls off a pool table.

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In terms of instant relief, canceling plans is like heroin.

(1982 – ) American comedian, actor, writer & producer
Miscellaneous

Our humility is what makes us great.

(1937 – 2014) American co-host of radio show “Car Talk”
Miscellaneous

Whenever someone asks me to define love, I usually think for a minute, then I spin around and pin the guy’s arm behind his back… NOW who’s asking the questions?

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He has to sneak up on water fountain to get a drink.

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A lot of times when you first start out on a project you think: this is never going to be finished, but then it is, and you think: Wow, it wasn’t even worth it.

Miscellaneous

I've Never Gone to Bed with an Ugly Woman

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Happiness walks on busy feet.

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He won’t hit a lick at a snake.

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Limberlost,  Missouri

Miscellaneous