Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Miscellaneous
(Page 71)
Yes, so it does.
Nicholas Longworth III
(1869 – 1931) American politician
Miscellaneous
Wordplay
After a companion ran his hand over Longworth’s bald head and commented “Nice and smooth. Feels just like my wife’s bottom
A face like a boiled fist
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
Energizer Bunny arrested… charged with battery.
Steven Wright
(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Miscellaneous
With every new sunrise, there is a new chance; but with every sunset, you blew it.
Miscellaneous
Beanville, Vermont
Miscellaneous
Braggin’ dog
Country expression
Miscellaneous
A favorite dog
One’s best dog
Other expressions
He acts like he’s ten feet tall and bullet-proof.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Conceited
Other expressions
Self-important
Oops!
Business name
Miscellaneous
Hair salons in Boston Massachusetts
As long as Pat stayed in the army
Country expression
Miscellaneous
No time at all
Of short duration
Other expressions
Too bad you can’t just grab a tree by the very tip-top and bend it clear over the ground and then let her fly, because I bet you’d be amazed at all the stuff that comes flying out.
Miscellaneous
Time to paint your butt white and run with the antelope.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
Stop arguing and do as you're told
If you ever get some outer-space guy in a headlock, and his head starts throbbing and glowing different colors, don’t let go; that just means the headlock is working.
Miscellaneous
Avon In The Amazon
The Therapy Sisters
Miscellaneous
Slower than molasses in January
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
Slow speed
He’s as tough as a boot.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
Tough
The bigger the box, the bigger the things that won't fit in it.
Anonymous
Miscellaneous
Size
Don’t go off with your pistol half cocked.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Don't get mad unless you have all the facts
Other expressions
Gooder’n snuff and not half as dusty
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Good
Other expressions
Cooter-backed road
Country definition
Miscellaneous
A crowned dirt road in the shaped of a cooter’s (turtle’s) back
Other expressions
Have to piss like a Russian race horse.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Have to pee really badly
Other expressions
It’s hotter than the hinges of Hell.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
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Yes, so it does.