Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 72)

What goes over the Devil’s back comes back over his belly.

Miscellaneous

You learn more character on the two-yard line than anywhere else in life.

American football player, coach & administrator
Miscellaneous

Railroad time

Miscellaneous

Sometimes life seems like a dream, especially when I look down and see that I forgot to put on my pants.

Miscellaneous

Devil's beating his wife with a frying pan

Miscellaneous

Crazy as a dog in a hub cap factory.

Miscellaneous

He's got both feet in the trough.

Miscellaneous

I was Caesarean born; you can’t really tell, although whenever I leave a house, I go out through the window.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Miscellaneous Self

I wouldn’t mind if animals ate my body, after I’m dead. And before I’m dead, they could lick me.

Miscellaneous

He just sits there like a bump on a log.

Miscellaneous

I’d like to see a movie where a guy is going to die when the sand runs out of an hourglass, but then at the last minute an ant stops the sand from running out. Then the rest of the movie is about the ant.

Miscellaneous

Not only was I not the best catcher in the major leagues, I wasn’t even the best catcher on my street.

(1926 – 2016) American baseball player, announcer & television host
Miscellaneous

Happier 'n a puppy with two peters.

Miscellaneous

It’s too bad cowboys didn’t eat much pizza back in the old west, because I think a good painting would be a cowboy giving his last slice to his horse.

Miscellaneous

She’s lost as last years Easter egg.

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Every dog has his day.

Miscellaneous

There is only one immutable law in life – in a gentleman’s toilet, incoming traffic has the right of way.

(1926 – 2009) Irish dramatist, television writer & essayist
Miscellaneous

He went after it whole hog.

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He has enough money to burn a wet mule.

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People need to realize that every time they talk about how “fragile” our planet is, it’s just like asking outer-space aliens to come invade us.

Miscellaneous

I didn’t just fall off a turnip truck.

Miscellaneous