Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 8)

I could eat the horse and chase the jockey.

Miscellaneous

Do you reckon the Queen has ever pulled a blanket up so just her head’s showing and gone ‘Philip, look at me! I’m a stamp!'

(1980 – ) English comedian, television and radio presenter & actor
England Miscellaneous

Would you raise that winder down! I'm freezin' my tail off!

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That size don't get no bigger.

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… I hadn’t the heart to touch my breakfast; I told Jeeves to drink it himself.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Miscellaneous

We’ve had to get a live-in nanny, ‘cos that dead one wasn’t working out.

(1968 – ) English comedian & actor
Miscellaneous

He’s going to blow the gates of hell wide open when he goes.

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If I ever get burned beyond recognition, and you can’t decide if it’s me or not, just put my funny fisherman’s hat on my head. “See, it’s me!”

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If they ever build a statue of me, I hope they don’t have me with my mouth wide open and holding a sign that says “I love rotten eggs.”

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I think there probably should be a rule that if you’re talking about how many loaves of bread a bullet will go through, it’s understood that you mean lengthwise loaves; otherwise, it makes no sense.

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He’s shorter than a mouse hole.

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You look like five miles of bad road.

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I think the movie actually made my heart beat slower.

American movie critic
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You don't have the sense God gave a gnat.

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People need to realize that every time they talk about how “fragile” our planet is, it’s just like asking outer-space aliens to come invade us.

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As full of wind as a corn-eating horse

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Don't get your tit in a ringer!

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Tall hog at the trough

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He's gotta whole head full of simple.

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Let me hug your neck.

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Avon In The Amazon

Miscellaneous