Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Misspokements
(Page 23)
New York Champagne – that’s a phony label; they don’t grow raisins in New York.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements
TV/Movie Quotes
When we’re competing for the Stanley Cup, this record won’t mean a thing.
Rick Bowness
professional hockey player
Misspokements
Sports
After his team tied a record with 37 straight road losses
Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having it.
Dan Quayle
(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Misspokements
Illegitimacy
Me and George and Billy are two of a kind.
Mickey Rivers
professional baseball player
Misspokements
Sports
On his relationship with George Steinbrenner and Billy Martin
As you look at the first four, the significant thing is that Alboreto is fifth.
Murray Walker
(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing
Misspokements
Sports
There’s someone warming up in the bullpen, but he’s obscured by his number.
Jerry Coleman
(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball
Misspokements
Sports
He’s a guy who gets up at six o’clock in the morning regardless of what time it is.
Lou Duva
(1922 – ) boxing trainer & manager
Boxing
Misspokements
Sports
On the training regime of heavyweight Andrew Golota
[Paul Revere] did warn the British… and I know my American history.
Sarah Palin
(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author
History
Misspokements
Paul Revere
We don’t want to go back to tomorrow, we want to go forward.
Dan Quayle
(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Communication
Future
Misspokements
Past
Speech
When I played football, we were small, but we were slow. Our record was five and five; we lost five games at home and five on the road.
Clayton Williams
Texas businessman
Football
Misspokements
Sports
Losing
We all get heavier as we get older because there’s a lot more information in our heads.
Vlade Divac
professional basketball player
Age
Body
Intelligence
Misspokements
Sports
Weight
I want to help clean up the state that is so sorry today of journalism; and I have a communications degree.
Sarah Palin
(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author
Communication
Misspokements
I’ve never known a Groundhog Day like this and I’ll have to go and see the film to find out what it’s all about.
David Pleat
English football player, manager & sports commentator
Misspokements
Situations
Groundhog Day
When my dad was explaining the facts of life to me, he drew me a big diaphragm.
Norm Crosby
(1927 – ) American comedian
Misspokements
Sex
We have a firm commitment to Europe; we are a part of Europe.
Dan Quayle
(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Misspokements
Places
Europe
It has made the richest prize in sport the richest prize in sport.
Joe Bugner
American boxer
Boxing
Misspokements
Sports
Put it out of your mind; in no time, it will be a forgotten memory.
Samuel Goldwyn
(1879 – 1974) film producer
Intelligence
Memory
Misspokements
Gonzo leaps like a giraffe and grabs it.
Jerry Coleman
(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball
Misspokements
Sports
You don’t like to see hookers going down on players like that.
Murray Mexted
New Zealand rugby player & commentator
Misspokements
Sports
Rugby
And here’s Moses Kiptanui – the 19 year old Kenyan, who turned 20 a few weeks ago.
David Coleman
(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs
Misspokements
Jesus was a Jew, yes, but only on his mother’s side.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Beliefs
Misspokements
Religion
Jesus
Jewish
Page 23 of 53
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