Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Misspokements
(Page 24)
He's a leading leader on this football team.
Bill Curry
American football coach
Football
Misspokements
Sports
And it’s a long drive down the line to centerfield.
Jerry Coleman
(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball
Misspokements
Sports
We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur.
Dan Quayle
(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Communication
Misspokements
Speech
Unforeseen events
She caught a touch of
laryngosis
from the smoke.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Health
Misspokements
Laryngitis
New York Champagne – that’s a phony label; they don’t grow raisins in New York.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements
TV/Movie Quotes
I think that was a moment of cool panic there.
Ron Atkinson
English former football player & manager
Misspokements
Three out of two.
Christina Applegate
(1971 – ) American actress
Misspokements
TV/Movie Quotes
As Kelly Bundy in “Married With Children”
And he’s done that in a whisker under 10 seconds, call it 9.7 in round figures.
Murray Walker
(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing
Misspokements
Sports
There’ll be only one winner now – in every sense.
David Coleman
(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs
Misspokements
Sports
Finley is going over to get a new piece of bat.
Jerry Coleman
(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball
Misspokements
Sports
The longer the game went on, you got the feeling that neither side really wanted to lose.
Mark Lawrenson
English football player & announcer
Colemanballs
Misspokements
Michael Owen isn't the tallest of lads, but his height more than makes up for that.
Mark Lawrenson
English football player & announcer
Misspokements
Sports
There's three of us in the band, so we split everything straight down the middle.
Mitch Mitchell
(1947 – 2008) English drummer
Misspokements
I’m glad you’re doing this story on us and not on the WNBA; we’re so much prettier than all the other women in sports.
Martina Hingis
professional tennis player
Misspokements
Sports
Tennis
Fear was absolutely necessary; without it, I would have been scared to death.
Floyd Patterson
American boxing champion
Boxing
Misspokements
Sports
Hey, the offensive linemen are the biggest guys on the field, they're bigger than everybody else, and that's what makes them the biggest guys on the field.
John Madden
(1936 – ) American football coach & television announcer
Football
Misspokements
Sports
Offensive linemen
The late start is due to the time.
David Coleman
(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs
Misspokements
Time
Lateness
He was between a rock and the deep blue sea.
Unknown
Misspokements
Mixed metaphors
Stewart has two cars in the top five: Magnusson 5th and Barichello 6th.
Murray Walker
(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing
Misspokements
Sports
Such
Bulgarians should be vanished.
William Archibald Spooner
(1844 – 1930) English dean at Oxford whose name is given to the accidental transposition of sounds of two or more words
Misspokements
Spoonerism
Such vulgarians should be banished
The stronger the wetlands, the more likely the damage of the hurricane.
George W. Bush
(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president
Misspokements
Environment
Hurricanes
On preserving wetlands
Page 24 of 53
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