Subject: Misspokements (Page 36)

No, I think that was when Abraham Lincoln signed the Declaration of Independence. Ya know, “Fourscore and seven years ago.”

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

And here’s Moses Kiptanui – the 19 year old Kenyan, who turned 20 a few weeks ago.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements

I would have brung you flowers too, but I read in a magazine that they suck up all the carbon monoxygen.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

If you’d offered me a 69 at the start this morning I’d have been all over you.

Scottish professional golfer
Golf Misspokements Sports

The stronger the wetlands, the more likely the damage of the hurricane.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president
Misspokements

Kevin Keegan said if he had a blank sheet of paper, five names would be on it.

English football player & analyst
Misspokements

The United States has so much to offer the third world war.

(1911 – 2004) 40th U.S. president & actor
Misspokements

She changes prices. I caught her in a near misdemeanus.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Crime Misspokements

All of the Mets' road wins against Los Angeles this year have been at Dodger Stadium.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

It’s a humbling thing being humble.

Ohio State football player
Misspokements Sports

I don’t want to shoot my mouth in my foot, but those are games we can win.

professional basketball player
Basketball Misspokements Sports

Clint Eastwood is arriving… and here is Raquel Welch’s car… and here’s Alfred Hitchcar’s cock.

Misspokements

The streets are safe in Philadelphia – it’s only the people who make them unsafe.

(1920 – 1991) American police officer & mayor of Philadelphia
Conflict Crime Misspokements Places

And there’s the unmistakable figure of Joe Mercer… or is it Lester Piggott.

British horse racing commentator
Misspokements Sports

A lot of the seats were half empty.

Misspokements

All of his saves have come during relief appearances.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment; it’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Communication Misspokements Speech

It ain’t enough that he’s a Pinko and an atheist; you gonna turn him from a man to a morphadite?

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

Brundle is driving an absolutely pluperfect race.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

There definitely needs to be water on the sidelines for these players, but I also had some Gatorade just in case they were allergic to the water or vice versa.

(1936 – ) American football coach & television announcer
Alcohol Health Misspokements Sports

The next time I send a damn fool for something, I go myself.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Misspokements Situations