Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Misspokements
(Page 49)
I'm concentrating so much I don't know what I'm doing half the time.
Mark Kaylor
British boxer
Misspokements
Sports
Concentrating
They had us with the walls to our back.
Harvey Kuenn
professional baseball player & manage
Misspokements
Sports
Fred Davis, the doyen of snooker, now 67 years of age and too old to get his leg over, prefers to use his left hand.
Ted Lowe
BBC commentator
Misspokements
Sports
Snooker
I love my name: Paris is my favorite city, and Paris without the ‘P’ is “heiress.”
Paris Hilton
(1981 – ) heiress, socialite, media personality & model
Misspokements
People
Self
Name
The Mets just had their first .500 or better April since July of 1992.
Ralph Kiner
(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball
Misspokements
Sports
If I look confused it is because I am thinking.
Samuel Goldwyn
(1879 – 1974) film producer
Appearance
Intelligence
Misspokements
Speech
Thinking
Confusion
Always we in Russia have something erect that we don’t need instead of what is needed.
Viktor Chernomyrdin
(1938 – 2010) Russian politician
Misspokements
Today Chicago, tomorrow's Saturday.
Christina Applegate
(1971 – ) American actress
Misspokements
TV/Movie Quotes
As Kelly Bundy in “Married With Children”
I don’t care if it doesn’t make a nickel; I just want every man, woman, and child in America to see it.
Samuel Goldwyn
(1879 – 1974) film producer
Misspokements
From the waist down, Earl Campbell has the biggest legs I have ever seen on a running back.
John Madden
(1936 – ) American football coach & television announcer
Misspokements
Sports
Earl Campbell
Legs
The Americans sowed the seed, and now they have reaped the whirlwind.
Sebastian Coe
English athlete & politician
Misspokements
Sports
That sure did take the steam out of his sails.
Anonymous
Misspokements
Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing – but none of them serious.
Alan Minter
English professional boxer
Boxing
Misspokements
Sports
I don’t know if he throws a spitball but he sure spits on the ball.
Casey Stengel
(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Baseball
Misspokements
Sports
Pitching
Spitballs
Houston has its largest crowd of the night here this evening.
Jerry Coleman
(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball
Misspokements
Sports
You guys lineup, alphabetically by height.
Bill Peterson
football coach
Misspokements
Sports
He’s going for the green – and for those watching in black and white it’s behind the brown.
Ted Lowe
BBC commentator
Misspokements
Sports
Describing a snooker game
It was six and half a dozen, and six won.
Chris Kamara
English football player & commentator
Misspokements
He’s 31 this year – last year he was 30.
David Coleman
(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Age
Colemanballs
Misspokements
There are four different cars filling the first four places.
Murray Walker
(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing
Misspokements
Sports
If we're going to win the pennant, we've got to start thinking we're not as good as we think we are.
Casey Stengel
(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Baseball
Misspokements
Sports
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