Subject: Money (Page 21)

Any renovation project on an old house will cost twice as much and take three times as long as originally estimated.

Money Murphy’s Laws Time

You're never too poor for good toilet paper.

comedian
Money Poverty Things

If you want to be on the upper crust, you need to have a lot of dough.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Money

Sex is like money; only too much is enough.

(1932 – 2009) author, poet & critic
Money Sex

My formula for success is rise early, work late, and strike oil.

(1892 – 1976) oil industrialist (once world’s richest man)
Money Success Wealth

When it comes to giving—some people stop at nothing.

Characteristics Money People

Sure, it's nice to win; but there's only one thing that's important to me and that's the money we're going to get, win or lose.

professional baseball player
Baseball Money Sports

A man has one hundred dollars and you leave him with two dollars, that's subtraction.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Men Money

The price of any product produced for a government agency will be not less than the square of the initial Firm Fixed-Price Contract.

Government Money Murphy’s Laws

No matter how rich you become, how famous or powerful, when you die the size of your funeral will still pretty much depend on the weather.

comedian, counselor & speaker
Death Science/Weather Success Wealth

One of the most difficult things in the world is to convince a woman that even a bargain costs money.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Money People Shopping Women

If the shoe fits, it's too expensive.

writer, humorist, columnist & speaker
Appearance Clothing Money

I got a $290 parking ticket today… my car only cost $240.

(1973 – ) American stand-up comedian
Autos Money Things

He found it inconvenient to be poor.

(1731 – 1800) English poet & hymn-writer
Money Poverty

Lack of money is the root of all evil.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Money Poverty

Death is a wonderful way of cutting down on your expenses.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Death Money

When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: 'Whose?'

(1878 – 1937) humorist, journalist & author
Money People Wealth Work

I bought a million lottery tickets… I won a dollar.


Activities Money

If you have a harem of 40 women, you never get to know any of them very well.

(1930 – ) financier & investment businessman
Money

The safest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it in your pocket.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Money

I was having trouble making ends meet, and my beginnings weren't meeting either.

(1924 – 1973) American comic
Money