Subject: Money (Page 27)

Money frees you from doing things you dislike; since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Money

The wages of sin are unreported.

Money Murphy’s Laws Taxes

If all the rich people in the world divided up their money among themselves, there wouldn't be enough to go around.

(1902 – 1983) Australian novelist & short-story writer
Money People Wealth

The Catholic Church is still very angry about The Da Vinci Code… they don’t like anything that makes more money in a weekend than they do.

(1950 – ) comedian & television host
Entertainment Film Money

A set of rules laid out by professionals to show the way they would like to act if it was profitable.

(1902 – 1963) Danish actor
Characteristics Money

Rich people bring a lawyer; Latinos and blacks bring their moms.

(1976 – ) comedian
Lawyers Money Mothers People

Money is what you’d get on beautifully without if only other people weren’t so crazy about it.

Money

If [an actor] says, 'But what's my motivation?… 'I say, 'Your salary.'

(1899 – 1980) English filmmaker & producer
Acting Entertainment Money

It's so cold here in Washington, D.C., that politicians have their hands in their own pockets.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Government Money Places Politics

Does [life] begin at conception, or does it begin when the baby is an embryo? … anybody with children knows [it] don’t begin ’til they can pay their own damn bills.

(1963 – ) American actor & stand-up comedian
Children Family Money

If writers were good businessmen, they'd have too much sense to be writers.

(1876 – 1944) American author, humorist & columnist
Communication Money Reading/Writing

People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Money Occupations People Work

Virginia has already spent more on plugging Shawn Moore for the Heisman Trophy than Thomas Jefferson spent getting elected president.

(1931 – 2012) American college football historian & television commentator
Activities Football Government Money Sports

Mendoza: I am a brigand: I live by robbing the rich.

Tanner: I am a gentleman: I live by robbing the poor.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Money People

The compromise will always be more expensive than either of the suggestions it is compromising.

Money Murphy’s Laws

Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing – and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
America Money

If ignorance ever goes to $40 a barrel, I want drilling rights on George Bush's head.

(1943 – ) U.S. agriculture commissioner, columnist, activist & author
Insults Intelligence Money

Some couples go over their budgets very carefully every month; others just go over them.


Money

Are you buying or selling?

(1906 – 1998) Russian-born English film producer & media mogul
Money Situations

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it rains.

(1874 – 1963) American poet
Money Science/Weather

A hotel mini-bar allows you to see into the future and what a can of Pepsi will cost in 2020.

(1954 – ) American comedian, writer & musician
Food/Drink Future Money Time