Subject: Money (Page 28)

There is nothing so disastrous as a rational investment policy in an irrational world.

(1883 – 1946) English economist
Money

If it weren’t for baseball, many kids wouldn’t know what a millionaire looked like.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Baseball Children Money Sports Wealth

A little incompatibility is the spice of life, as long as he has income and she is pattable.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Appearance Body Money Situations Women

Talk is cheap – except when Congress does it.

(1923 – ) American quote & quip writer
Communication Congress Frugal Government Money Speech

Some men worship rank, some worship heroes, some worship power, some worship God, & over these ideals they dispute & cannot unite — but they all worship money.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Beliefs Money

If only God would give me some clear sign! … like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Beliefs God Money Situations

There are two distinctive classes of people today, those who have personal computers, and those who have several thousand extra dollars apiece.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Computers Money People Things

If thee marries for money, thee surely will earn it.

Wisconsin politician, professor & writer
Marriage Money

Love goes out the door when money comes innuendo.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Emotions Love Money

I know when I'm having sex with a woman, she's thinking about love and marriage and romance, and I'm thinking, 'A hundred bucks?… I can't afford this.'

comedian
Money Sex

It takes money to make money because you have to copy the design exactly.

comedian
Money

Fifty percent of America’s population spends less than ten dollars a month on romance; you know what we call these people? … Men.

(1950 – ) comedian & television host
Men Money People

It is not economical to go to bed early to save the candles if the result is twins.

Children Money Proverbs Sex

What good is money if it can’t inspire terror in your fellow man?

cartoon character in, The Simpsons (Harry Shearer)
Money TV/Movie Quotes

If you lend someone $20, and never see that person again; it was probably worth it.

Beliefs Money People

The conviction of the rich that the poor are happier is no more foolish than the conviction of the poor that the rich are.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Happiness Intelligence Money Poverty Wealth

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Money Things

No woman can be too rich or too thin.

Duchess of Windsor (1896 – 1986) American socialite & wife of the Prince Edward, formerly King Edward VIII
Appearance People Wealth Women

If all the nations in the world are in debt, where did all the money go?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Money

(Starbucks) doesn't have a slogan yet, so I thought of one for them: “It's really expensive, but the line is long.”

comedian & author
Money

In this country you’re guilty until proven wealthy.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
America Government Law Money Wealth