Subject: Money (Page 34)

You can't get rich sitting on the bench, but I'm giving it a try.

professional baseball player
Baseball Money Sports

The probability of winning is inversely proportional to the amount of the wager.

Money Murphy’s Laws

Anything worth doing is worth doing for money.

Money Murphy’s Laws Work

Markets can remain irrational a lot longer than you and I can remain solvent.

American financial analyst & commentator
Money

I love to go to Washington – if only to be near my money.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Government Money Places

My sister just got married; I was the maid of debt in that little event.

(1965 – ) American comedian
Marriage Money Relationships

Some people pay their bills when due, some when overdue, and some never do.

Money

Saving is a very fine thing; especially when your parents have it for you.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Money

It ain't no disgrace to be poor, but it might as well be.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Money Poverty

Broke as a whore during lent.

Money Poverty

Money is something you got to make in case you don’t die.

(? – 1968) Russian-American, founder of New York’s famed Stage Deli
Money

I've been doing the Fonda workout: the Peter Fonda workout; that's where I wake up, take a hit of acid, smoke a joint, and run to my sister's house and ask her for money.

(1956 – 2016) American stand-up comedian & actor
Activities Drugs Exercise Money

A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of.

(1775 – 1817) English novelist
Emotions Happiness Money

He’s the only man I ever knew who had rubber pockets so he could steal soup.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Frugal Insults Money

There were many times my pants were so thin I could sit on a dime and tell if it was heads or tails.

(1667 – 1745) Irish satirist & essayist
Appearance Clothing Money Poverty

Whoever has the gold makes the rules.

Money Murphy’s Laws

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Money Things

When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: 'Whose?'

(1878 – 1937) humorist, journalist & author
Money People Wealth Work

Poverty is the step-mother of genius.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Intelligence Money

I lent a friend of mine $10,000 for plastic surgery and now I don’t know what he looks like.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Appearance Money

The only people making money these days are the ones who sell computer paper.

Computers Money Murphy’s Laws Things