Subject: Money (Page 35)

They were living high on the cob.

Life Malaprops Money

Before borrowing from a friend, decide which you need most.

Friends Money People Young

Take all the fools out of this world and there wouldn’t be any fun living in it, or profit.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Fools Intelligence Life Money

Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Money People

When a feller says, ‘It hain’t the money, but the principle o’ th’ thing’, it’s the money.

(1856 – 1915) writer, publisher, artist & philosopher
Money

I don’t want to tell you how much insurance I carry with the Prudential, but all I can say is: when I go, they go too.

(1894 – 1974) comedian, radio & television host
Communication Money

Nothing will dispel enthusiasm like a small admission fee.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Emotions Money

There is only one thing for a man to do who is married to a woman who enjoys spending money, and that is enjoy earning it.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Husbands Marriage Money Wives

A set of rules laid out by professionals to show the way they would like to act if it was profitable.

(1902 – 1963) Danish actor
Characteristics Money

I'm gonna ask the Falcons for so much money they'll have to put me on layaway.

American football player
Football Money Sports

I love to go to Washington – if only to be near my money.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Government Money Places

Money frees you from doing things you dislike; since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Money

The price of any product produced for a government agency will be not less than the square of the initial Firm Fixed-Price Contract.

Government Money Murphy’s Laws

People will swim through shit if you put a few bob in it.

(1925 – 1980) British comedian & actor
Money

He is so poor… he can't even pay attention.

Exaggerations Money Poverty

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

(1907 – 1987) journalist & columnist
Money

Untold Wealth: That which does not appear on income tax returns.

Definitions Government Money Taxes

There is no stronger craving in the world than that of the rich for titles, except that of the titled for riches.

(1887 – 1964) British actor, writer & theater director
Money Wealth

Keep up with the Grabowskis… you'll never make enough to keep up with the Joneses.

Money Murphy’s Laws

No matter how long or how hard you shop for an item, after you've bought it it will be on sale somewhere cheaper.

Money Murphy’s Laws Shopping Time

I’m not a paranoid deranged millionaire; Goddammit, I’m a billionaire.

(1905 – 1976) industrialist, aviator, engineer, film producer & philanthropist
Money People Self