Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 34)

View All Murphys Laws

It is impossible to distinguish, from a distance, whether the bureaucrats associated with your project are simply sitting on their hands, or frantically trying to cover their asses.

Murphy’s Laws Situations

Every solution breeds new problems.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at and repair.

(1952 – 2001) English writer, dramatist, & musician
Failure Murphy’s Laws Problems Situations Things

If it works, don't fix it.

Murphy’s Laws

Internal consistency is valued more highly than efficiency.

Murphy’s Laws

The organization of any bureaucracy is very much like a septic tank. The really big chunks always rise to the top.

Murphy’s Laws

Then, of course, there's that old one: Never use a preposition to end a sentence with.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

He who trains his tongue to quote the learned sages will be known far and wide as a smart-ass.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Speech

The problem-solving process will always break down at the point at which it is possible to determine who caused the problem.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

1. Never draw what you can copy.
2. Never copy what you can trace.
3. Never trace what you can cut out and paste down.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

An ounce of image is worth a pound of performance.

Murphy’s Laws

Procrastination shortens the job and places the responsibility for its termination on someone else (i.e., the authority who imposed the deadline.)

Murphy’s Laws

One out of three hundred and twelve Americans is a bore, for instance, and a healthy male adult bore consumes each year one and a half times his own weight in other people’s patience.

Murphy’s Laws People

Anything, no matter how bad, will sound good if played at a very high volume for a short time.

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

Most jobs resemble a sled dog team: no one gets a change of scenery, except the lead dog.

Animals Dogs Murphy’s Laws Situations Work

He from whom you first ask the way will be a stranger too.

Murphy’s Laws People

For every complex problem, there is a solution that is clear, simple, and wrong.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

Even paranoids have enemies.

Murphy’s Laws People

Some do; some don’t.

Murphy’s Laws People

1. Giving away baby clothes and furniture is a major cause of pregnancy. 2. Always be backlit. 3. Sit down whenever possible.

Appearance Murphy’s Laws Situations

Density of fire increases proportionally to the curiousness of the target.

Military Murphy’s Laws