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humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Murphy’s Laws
(Page 39)
View All Murphys Laws
Nothing matters very much, and very few things matter at all.
Lord Balfour's Contention
Murphy’s Laws
Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn’t have to do it himself.
Weiler's Law
Murphy’s Laws
People
A. H. Weiler
Impossible
In a surplus labor economy, the squeaking wheel does not get the grease; it gets replaced.
Miller's Maxim
Murphy’s Laws
Occupations
Work
Jobs
Labor
Squeaky wheel
1. If reproducibility may be a problem, conduct the test only once.2. If a straight line fit is required, obtain only two data points.
Velilind's Laws of Experimentation
Murphy’s Laws
Straight lines
Testing
Employees in a hierarchy do not really object to incompetence in their colleagues.
Peter's Paradox
Murphy’s Laws
People
Hierarchies
Incompetence
Organizations
Some mistakes are too fun to make only once.
Beers Law of Reciprocating Systems Dynamics
Mistakes
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
David L. Beers
The only time suppressive fire works is when it is used on abandoned positions.
A Murphy's Military Law
Military
Murphy’s Laws
If you change lines, the one you just left will start to move faster than the one you are now in.
O'Brian's Law
Murphy’s Laws
Changing lines
Speed
Of two possible events, only the undesired one will occur.
Dude's Law of Duality
Murphy’s Laws
In any group of eagles, you will find some turkeys.
Allaln’s Theorem
Murphy’s Laws
People
Allan Guerrina
Internal consistency is valued more highly than efficiency.
Peter's Inversion
Murphy’s Laws
Consistency
Efficiency
Incompetence tends to increase with the level of work performed. And naturally the individual’s staff needs will increase as his level of incompetence increases.
Riggs’s Hypothesis
Murphy’s Laws
Work
(Arthur J. Riggs)
Incompetence
You know you're getting old when everything dries up or leaks.
Witcoff's Truism
Age
Murphy’s Laws
Old
Anything, no matter how bad, will sound good if played at a very high volume for a short time.
Culshaw's First Principle of Recorded Sound
Murphy’s Laws
Science/Weather
Sound
Volume
When you arrive at your chosen campsite, it is full.
Barber's Fourth Law of Backpacking
Activities
Murphy’s Laws
Backpacking
Campsites
If it looks easy, it's tough… if it looks tough, it's near impossible.
Stockmayer's Theorem
Characteristics
Murphy’s Laws
Situations
Difficult
Impossible
At any particular time, there are more horse's asses in the world than horses.
Universal Equine Equation
Characteristics
Murphy’s Laws
People
Horse's asses
When walking a dog, be sure then animal is smaller than you.
Kassorla's Safe-Distance Axiom
Animals
Dogs
Murphy’s Laws
1. If you must make a decision, delay it.
2. If you can authorize someone else to avoid a decision, do so.
3. If you can form a committee, have them avoid the decision.
4. If you can otherwise avoid a decision, avoid it immediately.
Rangnekar's Modified Rules Concerning Decisions
Murphy’s Laws
Decisions
1. In dealing with their “own” problems, faculty members are the most extreme conservatives 2. In dealing with “other” people's problems, they are the world's most extreme liberals.
Kerr-Martin Law
Beliefs
Government
Murphy’s Laws
Situations
Conservatives
Liberals
If you can keep your head while those around you are losing theirs, you may have misjudged the situation.
A Murphy's Military Law
Military
Murphy’s Laws
Page 39 of 88
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