Murphy’s Laws | Just-One-Liners.com

Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 40)

If you want a track team to win the high jump you find one person who can jump seven feet, not seven people who can jump one foot.

Terman's Law of Innovation

Murphy’s Laws Sports Success Track

Any significant military action will occur at the junction of two or more map sheets.

Slim’s Law

Military Murphy’s Laws Field Marshal Viscount Slim Maps

All the postmasters in small towns read all the postcards.

Mencken and Nathan's Second Law of the Average American

Murphy’s Laws Mail Postcards

If it’s clean, it isn’t laundry.

Clive’s Rebuttal to Walker’s Law

Murphy’s Laws Laundry

By the time you get to the point where you can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends.

Goda's Truism

Money Murphy’s Laws Time

History doesn't repeat itself – historians merely repeat each other.

First Rule of History

History Murphy’s Laws Time Historians

Almost anything is easier to get into than out of.

Agnes Allen's Law

Murphy’s Laws

The compromise will always be more expensive than either of the suggestions it's compromising.

Juhani's Law

Money Murphy’s Laws Compromises

1. Nothing minor ever happens to a car on the weekend. 2. Nothing minor ever happens to a car on a trip. 3. Nothing minor ever happens to a car.

Hartman's Automotive Laws

Autos Murphy’s Laws Problems Weekends

When an irresistible force meets an immovable object, an unethical lawyer will immediately appear.

Law of Resistance

Lawyers Murphy’s Laws

An official wants to multiply subordinates, not rivals.

Parkinson's Axioms I

Murphy’s Laws People

All buses heading in the opposite direction drive off the face of the earth and never return.

Corcoroni's Third Law of Bus Transportation

Activities Murphy’s Laws Travel Buses Transportation

The quality of a champagne is judged by the amount of noise the cork makes when it is popped.

Mencken and Nathan's Ninth Law of The Average American

Alcohol Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws Champagne

The length of any meeting is inversely proportional to the length of the agenda for that meeting.

McLaughlin's Law (see Parson's Third Law)

Murphy’s Laws Time Meetings

A consultant is someone who, when hired to find out what time it is, borrows your watch to find out.

Rodriguez's Observation

Money Murphy’s Laws Consultants Watch

The hardness of the butter is in direct proportion to the softness of the bread.

Anonymous Murphy’s Law

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws Bread Butter

Once you open a can of worms, the only way to recan them is to use a bigger can.

Zymurgy's First Law of Systems Dynamics

Murphy’s Laws Problems Can of worms Conrad Schneiker

In a restaurant with seats which are close to each other, one will always find the decibel level of the nearest conversation to be inversely proportional to the quality of the thought going into it.

Law of Restaurant Acoustics

Communication Conversation Murphy’s Laws Speech Restaurants Restaurants

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Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 40)

When you are over the hill, you pick up speed.

Don't use a run-on sentence you got to punctuate it.

Delay is the deadliest form of denial.

If you want a track team to win the high jump you find one person who can jump seven feet, not seven people who can jump one foot.

Any significant military action will occur at the junction of two or more map sheets.

All the postmasters in small towns read all the postcards.

If it’s clean, it isn’t laundry.

By the time you get to the point where you can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends.

History doesn't repeat itself – historians merely repeat each other.

Almost anything is easier to get into than out of.

The compromise will always be more expensive than either of the suggestions it's compromising.

1. Nothing minor ever happens to a car on the weekend. 2. Nothing minor ever happens to a car on a trip. 3. Nothing minor ever happens to a car.

When an irresistible force meets an immovable object, an unethical lawyer will immediately appear.

An official wants to multiply subordinates, not rivals.

All buses heading in the opposite direction drive off the face of the earth and never return.

The quality of a champagne is judged by the amount of noise the cork makes when it is popped.

The length of any meeting is inversely proportional to the length of the agenda for that meeting.

A consultant is someone who, when hired to find out what time it is, borrows your watch to find out.

The hardness of the butter is in direct proportion to the softness of the bread.

Once you open a can of worms, the only way to recan them is to use a bigger can.

In a restaurant with seats which are close to each other, one will always find the decibel level of the nearest conversation to be inversely proportional to the quality of the thought going into it.