Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 41)

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If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.

Education Murphy’s Laws School

The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

Murphy’s Laws War

Program complexity grows until it exceeds the capabilities of the programmer who must maintain it.

Computers Murphy’s Laws Things

There are coexisting elements in frustration phenomena which separate expected results from achieved results.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

An ounce of application is worth a ton of abstraction.

Murphy’s Laws

Never drink anything that’s still on fire.

Alcohol Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

No one is as ugly as their passport photo.

Appearance Murphy’s Laws Ugly

People to whom you are attracted invariably think you remind them of someone else.

Love Murphy’s Laws People

The first bug to hit a clean windshield lands directly in front of your eyes.

Autos Driving Murphy’s Laws Things

The effectiveness of a politician varies in inverse proportion to his commitment to principle.

Government Murphy’s Laws Politicians

Everyone who does not work has a scheme that does.

Murphy’s Laws Work

No matter what goes wrong, there’s always someone who will say he knew it would.

Murphy’s Laws People Problems

A dropped power tool will always land on the concrete instead of the soft ground (if outdoors) or the carpet (if indoors) – unless it is running, in which case it will fall on something it can damage (like your foot).

Accidents Murphy’s Laws Things

One of the greatest unsolved riddles of restaurant eating is that the customer usually gets faster service when the restaurant is crowded than when it is half empty; it seems that the less the staff has to do, the slower they do it.

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

A consultant may be defined as an unemployed practitioner.

Murphy’s Laws

Whenever one word or letter can change the entire meaning of a sentence, the probability of an error being made will be in direct proportion to the embarrassment it will cause.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Speech

There’s always one more bug.

Computers Murphy’s Laws Things

A block grant is a solid mass of money surrounded on all sides by governors.

Money Murphy’s Laws Politicians

By the time you get to the point where you can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends.

Money Murphy’s Laws Time

Changing things is central to leadership, and changing them before anyone else is creativeness.

Murphy’s Laws

People are always available for work in the past tense.

Murphy’s Laws People Work