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Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 47)

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author

Murphy’s Laws Things Electricity Flashlight

1. Everything is cold except what should be. 2. Everything, including the corn flakes, is greasy.

Laws of Institutional Food

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws Institutions

1. If you like it, they don't have it in your size. 2. If you like it and its in your size, it doesn't fit anyway. 3. If you like it and it fits, you can't afford it. 4. If you like it, it fits, and you can afford it, it falls apart the first time you wash it.

Hadley's Laws of Clothing Shopping

Appearance Clothing Murphy’s Laws Shopping

You will save yourself a lot of needless worry if you don't burn your bridges until you come to them.

First Rule of Negative Anticipation

Murphy’s Laws Situations Time Burning bridges Worry

1. Anything done while honking your horn is legal.
2. You may park anywhere if you turn your four-way flashers on.
3. A red light means the next six cars may go through the intersection.

Rules for driving in New York

Autos Driving Murphy’s Laws New York City Places

If everybody wants it, nobody gets it.

Price's First Law

Murphy’s Laws Situations

If, while you are in school, there is a shortage of qualified personnel in a particular field, then by the time you graduate with the necessary qualifications, that field's employment is glutted.

Marguerite Emmons

Education Learning Murphy’s Laws School Employment Qualifications

Virtue is its own punishment.

Denniston's Law

Murphy’s Laws Virtue

Crowded lifts (elevators) smell different to people with restricted growth.

Renau's Ramblings

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws Things Elevators Size Smell

Bad regulation begets worse regulation.

Mobil's Maxim

Murphy’s Laws Bureaucracy Regulation

Everybodyworks for the sales department

Woodruff’s Work Rule

Murphy’s Laws Occupations Work Jeff Woodruff

Things go right so they can go wrong.

Maahs's Law

Murphy’s Laws Problems

To err is human – to blame it on someone else is even more human.

Jacob's Law

Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems Blame

If a taxpayer thinks he can cheat safely, he probably will.

Diogenes's Second Dictum

Government Money Murphy’s Laws Taxes Cheating

The one who says it can’t be done shouldn’t interrupt the one doing it.

Roman Rule

Murphy’s Laws Work Interruption

Established technology tends to persist in spite of new technology.

Blaauw's Law

Murphy’s Laws Gerrit Blaauw Technology

An object at rest will be in the wrong place.

Gerrold's Second Law of Infernal Dynamics

Murphy’s Laws Things Object

When in doubt, predict that the present trend will continue.

Merkin's Maxim

Murphy’s Laws Trends

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Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 47)

If it is worth fighting for, it is worth fighting dirty for.

Anything, no matter how bad, will sound good if played at a very high volume for a short time.

Check to see if you any words out.

The lights are most likely to come back on at the precise moment you find the flashlight.

1. Everything is cold except what should be. 2. Everything, including the corn flakes, is greasy.

1. If you like it, they don't have it in your size. 2. If you like it and its in your size, it doesn't fit anyway. 3. If you like it and it fits, you can't afford it. 4. If you like it, it fits, and you can afford it, it falls apart the first time you wash it.

You will save yourself a lot of needless worry if you don't burn your bridges until you come to them.

1. Anything done while honking your horn is legal.
2. You may park anywhere if you turn your four-way flashers on.
3. A red light means the next six cars may go through the intersection.

If everybody wants it, nobody gets it.

If, while you are in school, there is a shortage of qualified personnel in a particular field, then by the time you graduate with the necessary qualifications, that field's employment is glutted.

Virtue is its own punishment.

Crowded lifts (elevators) smell different to people with restricted growth.

Bad regulation begets worse regulation.

Everybodyworks for the sales department

Things go right so they can go wrong.

To err is human – to blame it on someone else is even more human.

If a taxpayer thinks he can cheat safely, he probably will.

The one who says it can’t be done shouldn’t interrupt the one doing it.

Established technology tends to persist in spite of new technology.

An object at rest will be in the wrong place.

When in doubt, predict that the present trend will continue.