Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 47)

View All Murphys Laws

There are no "free lunches," but sometimes it costs more to collect money than to give away food.

Money Murphy’s Laws

Intelligent people, when assembled into an organization, will tend toward collective stupidity.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws People Stupidity Wisdom

There's no such thing as a large whiskey.

Alcohol Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

When there are sufficient funds in the checking account, checks take two weeks to clear; when there are insufficient funds, checks clear overnight.

Money Murphy’s Laws Time

Among economists, the real world is often a special case.

Murphy’s Laws

Doctors, dentists, and lawyers are only on time for appointments when you’re not.

Doctors Lawyers Murphy’s Laws

The most expensive component is the one that breaks.

Money Murphy’s Laws Things

Spend sufficient time in confirming the need and the need will disappear.

Murphy’s Laws Time

If it says “one size fits all,” it doesn’t fit anyone.

Clothing Murphy’s Laws

Those who cannot teach – administrate.

Murphy’s Laws Occupations Work

Any order that can be misunderstood has been misunderstood.

Military Murphy’s Laws Understanding

1. Never arrive on time, or you will be stamped a beginner.
2. Don't say anything until the meeting is half over; this stamps you as being wise.
3. Be as vague as possible; this prevents irritating the others.
4. When in doubt, suggest that a subcommittee be appointed.
5. Be the first to move for adjournment; this will make you popular – it's what everyone is waiting for.

Murphy’s Laws

Given any problem containing N equations, there will be N+1 unknowns.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

When working on a project, if you put away a tool that you're certain you're finished with, you will need it instantly.

Murphy’s Laws Things Time

1. All the IVs are at the other end of the hall.

2. There are two kinds of adhesive tape: the one that won't stay on and the one that won't come off.

Health Murphy’s Laws

The attention span of a computer is only as long as its electrical cord.

Computers Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Things

Hot glass looks the same as cold glass.

Murphy’s Laws

Nothing looks as good close up as it does from far away.

Appearance Murphy’s Laws

Interchangeable devices won't.

Murphy’s Laws Things

If anything can go wrong it will go wrong when Mr. Murphy is out of town.

Murphy’s Laws

Incompetence tends to increase with the level of work performed. And naturally the individual’s staff needs will increase as his level of incompetence increases.

Murphy’s Laws Work