Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 51)

View All Murphys Laws

Asking dumb questions is easier than correcting dumb mistakes.

Mistakes Murphy’s Laws

Washing machines only break down during the wash cycle.
Corollary: All breakdowns occur on the plumber's day off.

Failure Murphy’s Laws Problems

Last year's was always better.

Murphy’s Laws

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.

Marriage Men Murphy’s Laws People Wives

After the last of 16 mounting screws has been removed from an access cover, it will be discovered that the wrong access cover has been removed.

Murphy’s Laws

If you use a pole saw to saw a limb while standing on an aluminum ladder borrowed from your neighbor, the limb will fall in such a way as to bend the ladder before it knocks you to the ground.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

If you live long enough, something will kill you.

Death Life Murphy’s Laws

An expert is a person who avoids the small errors while sweeping on to the grand fallacy.

Failure Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems

If your condition seems to be getting better, it's probably your doctor getting sick.

Doctors Health Murphy’s Laws

Never conduct negotiations before 10:00 a.m. or after 4:00 p.m. Before 10:00 you appear too anxious, and after 4:00 they think you're desperate.

Murphy’s Laws

A complex system that works is invariably found to have evolved from a simple system that works.

Murphy’s Laws

A road map always tells you everything except how to refold it.

Murphy’s Laws

I called my lawyer and said, ‘Can I ask you two questions?’ He said, ‘What’s the second question?

Government Lawyers Murphy’s Laws

When all else fails, follow instructions.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

Facts without theory are trivia. Theory without facts is bullshit.

Beliefs Facts Murphy’s Laws

A little ignorance can go a long way.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Stupidity

You can make it foolproof, but you can't make it damnfoolproof.

Fools Intelligence Murphy’s Laws

A spoon placed in the sink will locate to maximize splash from the faucet.

Murphy’s Laws

A crisis is when you can't say "let's forget the whole thing."

Murphy’s Laws

Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself.

Murphy’s Laws Situations Sleep

Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value.

Murphy’s Laws