Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Thursday, April 3, 2025
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Subject:
Murphy’s Laws
(Page 52)
View All Murphys Laws
Urgency varies inversely with importance.
Frothingham's Fourth Law
Murphy’s Laws
Time
Urgency
Following the path of least resistance is what makes men and rivers crooked.
Nowlan’s Deduction
Characteristics
Honesty
Murphy’s Laws
Things will get worse before they get better; Who said things would get better?
Ehrman's Commentary on Ginsberg's Theorem
Murphy’s Laws
Better
Worse
When two people meet to decide how to spend a third person's money, fraud will result.
Gross's Law
Money
Murphy’s Laws
People
If an experiment works, you must be using the wrong equipment.
Bowie's Theorem
Murphy’s Laws
Things
Equipment
Experiments
1. Giving away baby clothes and furniture is a major cause of pregnancy. 2. Always be backlit. 3. Sit down whenever possible.
Alden’s Laws
Children
Family
Murphy’s Laws
Nancy Alden
Pregnancy
The uglier a man’s legs are, the better he plays golf.
Wells's Virtual Law
Appearance
Body
Golf
Murphy’s Laws
Sports
H.G. Wells
When eating an elephant, take one bite at a time.
Abrams' Advice
Eating
Food/Drink
Murphy’s Laws
Bite
Elephants
Children have more energy after a hard day of play than they do after a good night's sleep.
Gumperson's – Corollary IV
Children
Murphy’s Laws
Situations
Sleep
Energy
It’s easy to tell when you’ve got a bargain – it doesn’t fit.
Adam’s Corollary to Eve’s Discovery
Activities
Clothing
Murphy’s Laws
Shopping
Bargains
An easily understood, workable falsehood is more useful than a complex, incomprehensible truth.
Thumb’s Second Postulate
Characteristics
Honesty
Intelligence
Lies
Murphy’s Laws
Truth
If you’ve got them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow.
Colson's Law
Murphy’s Laws
Control
Hearts and minds
When you drop coins, the pennies will fall nearby, while all the others will roll out of sight.
Anonymous Murphy’s Law
Murphy’s Laws
Coins
Distance
The best simple-minded test of expertise in a particular area is the ability to win money in a series of bets on future occurrences in that area.
Allison's Precept
Money
Murphy’s Laws
Betting
Expertise
The most delicate component will be dropped.
Rosenfield's Regret
Accidents
Murphy’s Laws
Things
In order to get a loan you must first prove you don't need it.
Bankers Axiom
Money
Murphy’s Laws
Banks
Loans
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last.
Law of the Theater & Arena
Murphy’s Laws
Situations
Time
Seats
Make it sufficiently difficult for people to do something, and most people will stop doing it.
No. 3 Pencil Principle
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
Never do anything you wouldn’t get caught dead doing.
Rockefeller Principle
Life
Murphy’s Laws
Far-away talent always seems better than home-developed talent.
Hunter's Theory of Personnel Recruitment
Murphy’s Laws
People
Distance
Talent
Any product cut to length will be too short.
Klipstein's Observation
Murphy’s Laws
Things
Length
Short
Page 52 of 88
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Things will get worse before they get better; Who said things would get better?