Murphy’s Laws | Just-One-Liners.com

Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 52)

If you run into an old girlfriend – no matter how innocently – your wife will know about it before you get home.

Murphy's First Law for Husbands

Husbands Marriage Murphy’s Laws Wives

Everything takes longer than you think.

Murphy's Second Law

Murphy’s Laws Time Longer

Washington is a much better place if you are asking questions rather than answering them.

Dean's Law of the District of Columbia

Murphy’s Laws Places Questions Washington

The bag that breaks is the one with the eggs.

Woodside's Grocery Principle

Accidents Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws Bags Eggs

Any inanimate object, regardless of its position, configuration or purpose, may be expected to perform at any time in a totally unexpected manner for reasons that are either entirely obscure or else completely mysterious.

Flap's Law

Murphy’s Laws Things Inanimate objects

If you play with anything long enough, it will break.

Zahner's Law

Murphy’s Laws Things Time Break

If you're confident after you've just finished an exam, it's because you don't know enough to know better.

Weisman's Law of Examinations

Education Intelligence Murphy’s Laws School Exams Jay Weisman

Assumption is the mother of all foul-ups.

Tylk's Law

Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems (also Wethern’s Law) Assumption

Any product cut to length will be too short.

Klipstein's Observation

Murphy’s Laws Things Length Short

The other line moves faster.

Etorre's Observation

Activities Murphy’s Laws Shopping Lines

When you move something to a more logical place, you only can remember where it used to be and your decision to move it.

Alicia’s Discovery

Murphy’s Laws Things Alicia Dustria

Early to bed and early to rise makes a man tired in mid afternoon.

Storz’s Revision

Activities Murphy’s Laws Sleep Rudolf Stor

It’s the wrong size.

Wright’s Observation of Spacial Relativity

Murphy’s Laws Jonathan Wright Size

The day of the big heat wave is the day the office air conditioning breaks down.

Norris's Law

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Air conditioning

There's no time like the present for postponing what you don't want to do.

Hecht’s Fourth Law

Murphy’s Laws Procrastination

The higher up the organization, the fewer people appreciate Murphy's Law.

Ouzman’s Opinion

Murphy’s Laws Organizations

1. If it should exist, it doesn't.
2. If it does exist, it's out of date.
3. Only documentation for useless programs transcends the first two laws.

Arnold's Laws of Documentation

Murphy’s Laws Documentation

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Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 52)

The amount of intelligence on Earth is infinite; the population increases exponentially.

If you knew what you were doing you'd probably be bored.

In letters themes reports articles and stuff like that we use commas to keep strings apart.

If you run into an old girlfriend – no matter how innocently – your wife will know about it before you get home.

Everything takes longer than you think.

Washington is a much better place if you are asking questions rather than answering them.

The bag that breaks is the one with the eggs.

Any inanimate object, regardless of its position, configuration or purpose, may be expected to perform at any time in a totally unexpected manner for reasons that are either entirely obscure or else completely mysterious.

If you play with anything long enough, it will break.

If you're confident after you've just finished an exam, it's because you don't know enough to know better.

Assumption is the mother of all foul-ups.

Any product cut to length will be too short.

The other line moves faster.

When you move something to a more logical place, you only can remember where it used to be and your decision to move it.

Early to bed and early to rise makes a man tired in mid afternoon.

The number of adjectives and verbs that are added to the description of a menu item is in inverse proportion to the quality of the dish.

It’s the wrong size.

The day of the big heat wave is the day the office air conditioning breaks down.

There's no time like the present for postponing what you don't want to do.

The higher up the organization, the fewer people appreciate Murphy's Law.

1. If it should exist, it doesn't.
2. If it does exist, it's out of date.
3. Only documentation for useless programs transcends the first two laws.