Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Murphy’s Laws
(Page 55)
View All Murphys Laws
Security isn’t. Management can’t. Sales promotions don’t. Customer assistance doesn’t. Worker’s won’t.
Brook's Laws of Retailing
Murphy’s Laws
Work
Business
1. Any line, however short, is still too long.
2. Work is the crabgrass of life, but money is the water that keeps it green.
Sam's Axioms
Murphy’s Laws
Work
Lines
Some object to the fan dancer, others to the fan.
Si Perkins' ‘People Differ’ Law
Murphy’s Laws
Opinion
Objections
Whenever you need to stop at a light to put on makeup, every light will be green.
Milstead's Driving Principle
Autos
Murphy’s Laws
traffic lights
No matter where or what, there are makers, takers, and fakers.
Kegley's Principle of Observation
Murphy’s Laws
The one piece that holds the whole thing together will be missing.
Russ' Law of Assembly
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
Things
Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
Corollary to the Ike Tautology
Murphy’s Laws
Time
Nostalgia
You can’t make an omelet without breaking eggs.
Stalin's Law
Conflict
Food/Drink
Murphy’s Laws
If a situation requires undivided attention, it will occur simultaneously with a compelling distraction.
Hutchinson’s Law
Murphy’s Laws
Situations
Attention
Distraction
When dangling, don't use participles.
The 19 Rules for Good Riting - 7
Communication
Language
Murphy’s Laws
Reading/Writing
Much work, much food; little work, little food; no work, burial at sea.
Cook's Law
Food/Drink
Life
Murphy’s Laws
Work
Rules
If you volunteer to do a task that nobody likes to do, you'll be expected to do it every time in the future.
Kotowski's Law of Dirty Work
Murphy’s Laws
Situations
Work
Volunteering
It is better for civilization to be going down the drain than to be coming up it.
Allen's Law of Civilization
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
Civilization
The army with the smartest dress uniform will lose.
Murphy's Fifth Military Law
Conflict
Military
Murphy’s Laws
Army
Uniforms
Everyone has a scheme that will not work.
Howe's Law
Murphy’s Laws
People
Schemes
1. All's well that ends.
2. A penny saved is a penny.
3. Don't leave things unfinishe
Woods's Incomplete Maxims
Communication
Language
Murphy’s Laws
A condominium is just an apartment with a down payment.
Specht’s Discovery
Murphy’s Laws
Things
Condominiums
Robert Specht
The longer the title, the less important the job.
McGovern's Law
Murphy’s Laws
Work
Titles
Kickbacks must always exceed bribes.
The Hidden Truth of Management
Murphy’s Laws
Bribes
Management
1. If you can get to the faulty part, you won't have the tool to get it off. 2. If you can get the part off, the parts house will have it back ordered. 3. If it's in stock, it didn't need replacing in the first place.
Campbell's Laws of Automotive Repair
Autos
Murphy’s Laws
Things
Repairs
The more complicated and grandiose the plan, the greater the chance of a screw-up.
Knagg’s Law
Murphy’s Laws
Plans
Page 55 of 88
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