Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 55)

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The faster a computer is, the faster it will reach a crashed state.

Computers Failure Murphy’s Laws Things

To spot the expert, pick the one who predicts the job will take the longest and cost the most.

Money Murphy’s Laws People Time

Successful research attracts the bigger grant which makes further research impossible.

Murphy’s Laws

If you take something apart and put it back together enough times, eventually you will have two of them.

Murphy’s Laws

If you know something can go wrong, and take due precaution to prevent it, something else will go wrong.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

He who hesitates is last.

Murphy’s Laws

The colder the X-Ray table, the more of your body you are required to place on it.

Murphy’s Laws

Give a small boy a hammer and he will find that everything he encounters needs pounding.

Murphy’s Laws Things

If it is worth fighting for, it is worth fighting dirty for.

Conflict Fights Murphy’s Laws

The best simple-minded test of expertise in a particular area is the ability to win money in a series of bets on future occurrences in that area.

Money Murphy’s Laws

For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.

Government Murphy’s Laws

The lead in a pencil will break in direct proportion to the importance of the notes being taken.

Murphy’s Laws

Certain items which are crucial to a given activity will show up with uncommon regularity until the day when that activity is planned, at which point the item in question will disappear from the face of the earth.

Murphy’s Laws Things

The effort of catching a falling object will cause more destruction than if the object had been allowed to fall in the first place.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Science/Weather Things

Only kings, editors, and people with tapeworm have the right to use the editorial "we."

Murphy’s Laws

If you put a spoonful of wine in a barrel full of sewage, you get sewage. If you put a spoonful of sewage in a barrel full of wine, you get sewage.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

The shortest distance between two points is a downward spiral.

Failure Murphy’s Laws Problems

The efficiency of a committee meeting is inversely proportional to the number of participants and the time spent on deliberations.

Murphy’s Laws Time

1. If it is green or it wiggles – it is Biology.
2. If it stinks – it is Chemistry.
3. If it doesn’t work – it is Physics.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Science/Weather

Everybodyworks for the sales department

Murphy’s Laws Occupations Work

Every great idea has a disadvantage equal to or exceeding the greatness of the idea.

Ideas Intelligence Murphy’s Laws