Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 59)

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No matter how hard you try, every once in a while, something is going right.

Murphy’s Laws

Whenever you decide to take the kids home, it is always five minutes earlier that they break into fights, tears, or hysteria.

Children Murphy’s Laws Problems Time

You can never be sure how many beers you had last night.

Alcohol Beer Murphy’s Laws

No matter how often the lie is shown to be false, there will still remain a percentage of people who believe it true.

Beliefs Honesty Lies Murphy’s Laws

Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself.

Murphy’s Laws Situations Sleep

An intelligent person can make a dumber statement than an idiot. The idiot is limited to his imbecility.

Communication Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Speech

If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will have more than your fair share to take.

Military Murphy’s Laws

Academic politics is the most vicious and bitter form of politics, because the stakes are so low.

Education Government Murphy’s Laws Politics

Being frustrated is disagreeable, but the real disasters in life begin when you get what you want.

Murphy’s Laws Success

The wages of sin are unreported.

Money Murphy’s Laws Taxes

All pluses have their minuses.

Murphy’s Laws

Creativity varies inversely with the number of cooks involved with the broth.

Murphy’s Laws People

Being in politics is like being a football coach: you have to be smart enough to understand the game and dumb enough to think it’s important.

Education Government Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Politics Sports

Facts without theory are trivia. Theory without facts is bullshit.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws

Love is a matter of chemistry; sex is a matter of physics.

Emotions Love Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

Those who are unable to learn from past meetings are condemned to repeat them.

Murphy’s Laws

People will buy anything that's one to a customer.

Murphy’s Laws Shopping

Under current practices, both expenditures and revenues rise to meet each other, no matter which one may be in excess.

Money Murphy’s Laws

1. If you must make a decision, delay it.
2. If you can authorize someone else to avoid a decision, do so.
3. If you can form a committee, have them avoid the decision.
4. If you can otherwise avoid a decision, avoid it immediately.

Murphy’s Laws

The client who pays you the least complains the most.

Murphy’s Laws

The longer ahead you plan a special event, and the more special it is, the more likely it is to go wrong.

Murphy’s Laws Problems