Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 6)

View All Murphys Laws

Negative expectations yield negative results; positive expectations yield negative results.

Murphy’s Laws

The hardness of the butter is in direct proportion to the softness of the roll.

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

The attention span of a computer is only as long as its electrical cord.

Computers Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Things

Any bureaucracy reorganized to enhance efficiency is immediately indistinguishable from its predecessor.

Murphy’s Laws

If a headline ends in a question mark, the answer is “no.”

Headlines Murphy’s Laws

Find out the cost before you get in.

Money Murphy’s Laws

Clearly stated instructions will consistently produce multiple interpretations.

Murphy’s Laws

No matter which side of door the cat or dog is on, it's the wrong side.

Animals Cats Dogs Murphy’s Laws

Never leave hold of what you've got until you've got hold of something else.

Murphy’s Laws

The theory is supported as long as the funds are.

Murphy’s Laws

Everybodyworks for the sales department

Murphy’s Laws Occupations Work

The program you've been looking forward to all week will be preempted.

Entertainment Murphy’s Laws Television

The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the ability to reach it.

Murphy’s Laws

If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.

Murphy’s Laws

Whenever two fishing lines are contiguous, they will become continuous.

Activities Murphy’s Laws

History does not repeat itself; historians simply repeat each other.

History Murphy’s Laws Time

Law expands in proportion to the resources available for its enforcement.

Government Murphy’s Laws

1. When in charge ponder
2. When in trouble delegate
3. When in doubt mumble.

Murphy’s Laws Speech

Stay busy, get plenty of exercise, and don’t drink too much… then again, don’t drink too little.

Age Alcohol Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws Old

If you drop a full can of beer, and remember to rap the top sharply with your knuckle prior to opening, the ensuing gush of foam will be between 89 and 94 percent of the volume that would splatter you if you didn't do a damned thing and went ahead and pulled the top immediately.

Alcohol Beer Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws Situations

You can always find what you're not looking for.

Murphy’s Laws