Murphy’s Laws | Just-One-Liners.com

Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 7)

Envelopes and stamps which don't stick when you lick them will stick to other things when you don't want them to.

Fourth Law of Office Murphology

Murphy’s Laws Problems Things Envelopes Stamps

Immature poets imitate, mature poets steal.

T.S. Eliot

(1888 – 1965) British (US-born) critic, dramatist & poet

Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing Imitation Poets

People with money live so damn long.

Edwinn's Corollary

Age Life Murphy’s Laws Old

The chance of the bread falling with the butter side down is directly proportional to the value of the carpet.

Jennings' Corollary to the Law of Selective Gravity

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws Bread Butter Carpet Value

You can never be sure how many beers you had last night.

The Heineken Uncertainty Principle

Alcohol Beer Murphy’s Laws

Any new activity will cause more trouble than you can possibly imagine.

Bouchier’s Columbus Principle

Murphy’s Laws Problems Situations (David Bouchier)

He who shouts loudest has the floor.

Swipple's Rule of Order

Communication Murphy’s Laws Speech Meetings Shouting

The primary function of the design engineer is to make things difficult for the fabricator and impossible for the serviceman.

Anonymous Murphy's Law

Murphy’s Laws Problems Engineers

Those with the best advice offer no advice.

Dave's Law of Advice

Murphy’s Laws People Advice

If it works, don't fix it.

First Rule of Rural Mechanics

Murphy’s Laws Repairs

Nobody notices the big errors.

Mayne's Law

Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems Errors

Experience enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

F. P. Jones's Creed

Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems Experience

An object at rest will be in the wrong place.

Gerrold's Second Law of Infernal Dynamics

Murphy’s Laws Things Object

No child throws up in the bathroom.

Laura's Law

Children Health Murphy’s Laws Bathrooms

The colder the X-Ray table, the more of your body you are required to place on it.

Edds's Law of Radiology

Murphy’s Laws X-rays

If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

Lance’s Law

Murphy’s Laws Problems (Bert Lance)

If you think the world is against you – it doesn't necessarily mean that it isn't.

Samuel's Maxim

Murphy’s Laws World Paranoia

The quality of a champagne is judged by the amount of noise the cork makes when it is popped.

Mencken and Nathan's Ninth Law of The Average American

Alcohol Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws Champagne

1. Anyone can make a decision given enough facts. 2. A good manager can make a decision without enough facts. 3. A perfect manager can operate in perfect ignorance.

Spencer's Laws of Data

Facts Murphy’s Laws Decisions Managers

Quotes and One Liners

humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more

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Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 7)

If you leave the room, you're elected.

There is always a way… and it usually doesn’t work.

Envelopes and stamps which don't stick when you lick them will stick to other things when you don't want them to.

Immature poets imitate, mature poets steal.

People with money live so damn long.

The chance of the bread falling with the butter side down is directly proportional to the value of the carpet.

You can never be sure how many beers you had last night.

Any new activity will cause more trouble than you can possibly imagine.

He who shouts loudest has the floor.

The primary function of the design engineer is to make things difficult for the fabricator and impossible for the serviceman.

Those with the best advice offer no advice.

If it works, don't fix it.

Nobody notices the big errors.

Experience enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

An object at rest will be in the wrong place.

No child throws up in the bathroom.

The colder the X-Ray table, the more of your body you are required to place on it.

If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

If you think the world is against you – it doesn't necessarily mean that it isn't.

The quality of a champagne is judged by the amount of noise the cork makes when it is popped.

1. Anyone can make a decision given enough facts. 2. A good manager can make a decision without enough facts. 3. A perfect manager can operate in perfect ignorance.