Murphy’s Laws | Just-One-Liners.com

Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 75)

Circumstances can force a generalized incompetent to become competent, at least in a specialized field.

Freemon's Rule

Murphy’s Laws Incompetence

Nearly all prophecies made in public are wrong.

Turner's Law

Murphy’s Laws Situations Prophecies

The efficiency of a committee meeting is inversely proportional to the number of participants and the time spent on deliberations.

Old and Kahn's Law

Murphy’s Laws Time Committees

If you make something idiot-proof, the world will create a better idiot.

Grave's Law

Fools Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Stupidity

Any military project will take twice as long as planned, cost twice as much, and produce only half of what is wanted.

Vance's Rule of 2 1/2

Military Murphy’s Laws Deputy Secretary of Defense Cyrus Vance

Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion.

Parkinson's Law

Murphy’s Laws Time Work

Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance.

(Sam) Brown's Law

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws People Offending

At any public relations luncheon, the quality of the food is inversely related to the quality of the information.

Ubell's Law of Press Luncheons

Food/Drink Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Information Luncheons

When one is trying to be elegant and sophisticated, one won't.

Hartig's Sleeve in the Cup, Thumb in the Butter Law

Murphy’s Laws Problems Situations Elegant Sophisticated

Important letters that contain no errors will develop errors in the mail.
Corollary: Corresponding errors will show up in the duplicate while the boss is reading it.

First Law of Office Murphology

Communication Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems Letters

Whenever an expert is confounded by a seemingly insoluble problem, the solution is immediately obvious to the first unqualified person who happens along.

Anonymous Murphy’s Law

Murphy’s Laws Experts Solutions

It’s easy to tell when you’ve got a bargain – it doesn’t fit.

Adam’s Corollary to Eve’s Discovery

Activities Clothing Murphy’s Laws Shopping Bargains

The first shall be last and the last shall be first, but if you're in the middle, you're stuck there.

Newman's Observation

Murphy’s Laws Problems Situations

Facts without theory are trivia. Theory without facts is bullshit.

Beiser’s Brass Tack

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Facts Theory

If it works, don't fix it.

First Rule of Rural Mechanics

Murphy’s Laws Repairs

Nothing is ever so bad that it can't get worse.

Gattuso’s Extension of Murphy’s Law

Murphy’s Laws

To estimate the time it takes to do a task, estimate the time you think it should take, multiply by two, and change the unit of measure to the next highest unit. (Example: allocate two days for a one-hour task)

Westheimer's Rule

Murphy’s Laws Time Work Frank Westheimer

An expert is a person who avoids the small errors while sweeping on to the grand fallacy.

Weinberg's Corollary

Failure Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems Expert

People who park on the cast side of a football stadium will invariably have seats on the west side.

Gilbert's Conclusion

Murphy’s Laws

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Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 75)

The probability of winning is inversely proportional to the amount of the wager.

Inside every small problem is a large problem struggling to get out.

Circumstances can force a generalized incompetent to become competent, at least in a specialized field.

Nearly all prophecies made in public are wrong.

The efficiency of a committee meeting is inversely proportional to the number of participants and the time spent on deliberations.

If you make something idiot-proof, the world will create a better idiot.

Any military project will take twice as long as planned, cost twice as much, and produce only half of what is wanted.

Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion.

Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance.

At any public relations luncheon, the quality of the food is inversely related to the quality of the information.

When one is trying to be elegant and sophisticated, one won't.

Important letters that contain no errors will develop errors in the mail.
Corollary: Corresponding errors will show up in the duplicate while the boss is reading it.

Whenever an expert is confounded by a seemingly insoluble problem, the solution is immediately obvious to the first unqualified person who happens along.

It’s easy to tell when you’ve got a bargain – it doesn’t fit.

The first shall be last and the last shall be first, but if you're in the middle, you're stuck there.

Facts without theory are trivia. Theory without facts is bullshit.

If it works, don't fix it.

Nothing is ever so bad that it can't get worse.

To estimate the time it takes to do a task, estimate the time you think it should take, multiply by two, and change the unit of measure to the next highest unit. (Example: allocate two days for a one-hour task)

An expert is a person who avoids the small errors while sweeping on to the grand fallacy.

People who park on the cast side of a football stadium will invariably have seats on the west side.