Murphy’s Laws | Just-One-Liners.com

Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 77)

Before ordering a test, decide what you will do if it is (1) positive or (2) negative. If both answers are the same, don't take the test.

Cochrane's Aphorism

Murphy’s Laws Tests

Create the impression that you have already reached your level of incompetence.

Peter's Rule for Creative Incompetence

Murphy’s Laws Incompetence

Everything costs more and takes longer.

Pournelle's Law of Costs and Schedules

Money Murphy’s Laws Time Expense

1. Always hire a rich solicitor.
2. Never buy from a rich salesman.

Goldenstern's Rules

Lawyers Money Murphy’s Laws Wealth Salesmen

If it would be cheaper to buy a new unit, the company will insist upon repairing the old one.
Corollary: If it would be cheaper to repair the old one, the company will insist on the latest model.

Jaruk's Second Law

Murphy’s Laws Purchases Repairs

All battles are fought at the junction of two or more map sheets… printed at different scales.

A Murphy's Military Law

Military Murphy’s Laws Maps

The life expectancy of a house plant varies inversely with its price and directly with its ugliness.

Britt's Green Thumb Postulate

Appearance Murphy’s Laws Ugly Plants

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

Grandpa Charnock's Law

Driving Murphy’s Laws Swearing

Never worry about the bullet with your name on it; instead, worry about shrapnel addressed to 'occupant.’

Murphy's Tenth Military Law

Conflict Government Military Murphy’s Laws War Bullet Shrapnel

A man should be greater than some of his parts.

Mother Sigafoos's Observation

Murphy’s Laws People

The amount of time you have to wait for a bus is directly proportional to the inclemency of the weather.

Corcoroni's Second Law of Bus Transportation

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Bus Transportation

For every human problem, there is a neat, simple solution and it is always wrong.

H.L. Mencken

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist

Murphy’s Laws Problems Solutions Wrong

He who shouts loudest has the floor.

Swipple's Rule of Order

Communication Murphy’s Laws Speech Meetings Shouting

Quotes and One Liners

humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more

Categories

Additional Categories

Oops...

Some Popular Authors

Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 77)

Most jobs resemble a sled dog team: no one gets a change of scenery, except the lead dog.

Any task worth doing was worth doing yesterday.

Most people deserve each other.

If you explain so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will.

He who hesitates is last.

No experiment is reproducible.

Live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so.

You remember to mail a letter only when you're nowhere near a mailbox.

Before ordering a test, decide what you will do if it is (1) positive or (2) negative. If both answers are the same, don't take the test.

Create the impression that you have already reached your level of incompetence.

Everything costs more and takes longer.

1. Always hire a rich solicitor.
2. Never buy from a rich salesman.

If it would be cheaper to buy a new unit, the company will insist upon repairing the old one.
Corollary: If it would be cheaper to repair the old one, the company will insist on the latest model.

All battles are fought at the junction of two or more map sheets… printed at different scales.

The life expectancy of a house plant varies inversely with its price and directly with its ugliness.

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

Never worry about the bullet with your name on it; instead, worry about shrapnel addressed to 'occupant.’

A man should be greater than some of his parts.

The amount of time you have to wait for a bus is directly proportional to the inclemency of the weather.

For every human problem, there is a neat, simple solution and it is always wrong.

He who shouts loudest has the floor.