Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 78)

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I called my lawyer and said, ‘Can I ask you two questions?’ He said, ‘What’s the second question?

Government Lawyers Murphy’s Laws

A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping.

Military Murphy’s Laws

Batteries die at the most critical time of the most complex problem.

Failure Murphy’s Laws Problems Things

At least fifty percent of the human race doesn’t want their mother-in-law within walking distance.

Murphy’s Laws Relationships

The job that pays the most will be offered when there is no time to deliver the services.

Murphy’s Laws Work

Every organization has an allotted number of positions to be filled by incompetents.

Murphy’s Laws People

There are four kinds of people: those who sit quietly and do nothing, those who talk about sitting quietly and doing nothing, those who do things, and those who talk about doing things.

Communication Murphy’s Laws People Speech

We’re all going down the same road in different directions.

Life Murphy’s Laws

If your condition seems to be getting better, it's probably your doctor getting sick.

Doctors Health Murphy’s Laws

If mathematically you end up with the incorrect answer, try multiplying by the page number.

Murphy’s Laws

He who hesitates is not only lost, but several miles from the next freeway exit.

Driving Murphy’s Laws Travel

Nothing is as easy as it looks.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

A conclusion is the place where you get tired of thinking.

Murphy’s Laws Thinking

An object at rest will be in the wrong place.

Murphy’s Laws Things

Research is reading two books that have never been read in order to write a third that will never be read.

Books Communication Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

Never worry about the bullet with your name on it; instead, worry about shrapnel addressed to 'occupant.’

Conflict Government Military Murphy’s Laws War

In a bureaucracy, accomplishment is inversely proportional to the volume of paper used.

Murphy’s Laws

Nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all.

Murphy’s Laws

Women and elephants never forget an injury.

Intelligence Memory Murphy’s Laws Women

The crucial memorandum will be snared in the out-basket by the paper clip of the overlying correspondence and go to file.

Communication Murphy’s Laws

No matter where or what, there are makers, takers, and fakers.

Murphy’s Laws