Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Murphy’s Laws
(Page 86)
View All Murphys Laws
1. Giving away baby clothes and furniture is a major cause of pregnancy. 2. Always be backlit. 3. Sit down whenever possible.
Alden’s Laws
Appearance
Murphy’s Laws
Situations
Nancy Alden
The chances of anybody doing anything are inversely proportional to the number of other people who are in a position to do it instead.
Kushner’s Law
Murphy’s Laws
The world is more complicated than most of our theories make it out to be.
Berkeley's Laws I
Intelligence
Murphy’s Laws
Places
World
Theories
If enough data is collected, anything may be proven by statistical methods.
Williams and Holland's Law
Beliefs
Facts
Intelligence
Murphy’s Laws
Data
The most undesirable things are the most certain (death and taxes).
Gumperson's Proof
Death
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
Taxes
Certainty
If you find something you like buy a lifetime supply – they’re going to stop making it.
Gerhardt's Law
Murphy’s Laws
Things
Lifetime supply
Production
No matter how long or how hard you shop for an item, after you've bought it it will be on sale somewhere cheaper.
Lewis's Second Law
Money
Murphy’s Laws
Shopping
Time
Expense
The more you sweat in peace, the less you bleed in war.
A Murphy's Military Law
Health
Military
Murphy’s Laws
No matter which side of door the cat or dog is on, it's the wrong side.
Pet Principle
Animals
Cats
Dogs
Murphy’s Laws
Doors
The specialist learns more and more about less and less until, finally, he knows everything about nothing; whereas the generalist learns less and less about more and more until, finally, he knows nothing about everything.
Donsen's Law
Education
Learning
Murphy’s Laws
Generalists
Knowledge
Specialists
Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance.
Samuels Postulate
Murphy’s Laws
People
Situations
Offending
Style
Substance
When working on a project, if you put away a tool that you're certain you're finished with, you will need it instantly.
Law of Annoyance
Murphy’s Laws
Things
Time
Tools
If you drop a full can of beer, and remember to rap the top sharply with your knuckle prior to opening, the ensuing gush of foam will be between 89 and 94 percent of the volume that would splatter you if you didn't do a damned thing and went ahead and pulled the top immediately.
Goulden's Axiom of the Bouncing Can
Alcohol
Beer
Food/Drink
Murphy’s Laws
Situations
The idea is to die young as late as possible.
Montagu's Maxim
Age
Death
Murphy’s Laws
Time
Young
He who laughs first, laughs last… if nobody laughs in the middle.
Black’s Discovery
Laughter
Murphy’s Laws
Gerrit Blaauw
The most difficult light bulb to replace burns out first and most frequently.
Occam's Electric Razor
Failure
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
Light bulbs
No boss will keep an employee who is right all the time.
Pitfall of Genius
Murphy’s Laws
Bosses
Employees
No matter how bad you are playing, it is always possible to play worse.
Unknown
Golf
Murphy’s Laws
Sports
The Cavalry doesn’t always come to the rescue.
A Murphy's Military Law
Military
Murphy’s Laws
You always find something in the last place you look.
Boob's Law
Murphy’s Laws
Places
Things
If you have something to do and you put it off for long enough, the chances are someone else will do it for you.
Clyde's Law
Murphy’s Laws
Time
Procrastination
Page 86 of 88
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