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humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Murphy’s Laws
(Page 86)
View All Murphys Laws
In an underdeveloped country, don't drink the water; in a developed country, don't breathe the air.
Jonathan Raban
(1942 – ) British travel writer & novelist
Murphy’s Laws
Places
also Law of Nations
Water
Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
Andy Rooney
(1919 – 2011) American news commentator & writer
Murphy’s Laws
Probabilities
When taking something apart to fix a minor malfunction, you will cause a major malfunction.
Murphy's Second Law of Construction
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
Repairs
History does not repeat itself; historians simply repeat each other.
Bettman’s Revision
History
Murphy’s Laws
Time
Otto Bettman
The hardness of the butter is in direct proportion to the softness of the roll.
Thiessen's Law of Gastronomy
Food/Drink
Murphy’s Laws
Butter
The grass is brown on both sides of the fence.
Ed Yourdonradar's Fundamental Truth
Death
Murphy’s Laws
Envy
Grass
Reality
The quartermaster has only two sizes, too large and too small.
Murphy's Ninth Military Law
Clothing
Government
Military
Murphy’s Laws
Size
Employees in a hierarchy do not really object to incompetence in their colleagues.
Peter's Paradox
Murphy’s Laws
People
Hierarchies
Incompetence
Organizations
When it is not necessary to make a decision, it is necessary not to make a decision.
Falkland's Rule
Murphy’s Laws
Decisions
Things are never as bad as they turn out to be.
White’s Law
Murphy’s Laws
Problems
Situations
Richard N. White
Any decision is better than no decision.
Second Law Of Decision Making
Murphy’s Laws
Decisions
Caveats are always* forgotten.
*Caveat: except in rare instances.
Battleson’s Blathrskite
Murphy’s Laws
Caveat
Kirk Battleson
Whenever you lose contact with the enemy, look behind you.
A Murphy's Military Law
Military
Murphy’s Laws
If you can find something everyone agrees on, it’s wrong.
Udall’s Law
Murphy’s Laws
(Morris K. Udall)
Agreement
The possibility of getting lost is directly proportional to the number of times the direction-giver says "you can't miss it."
Winfield's Dictum of Direction Giving
Murphy’s Laws
Giving directions
Lost
The successful pundit is provided more opportunities to say things than he has things worth saying.
Pike Law of Punditry
Murphy’s Laws
Pundits
The hidden flaw never remains hidden.
Law of Revelation
Murphy’s Laws
Hidden flaws
In any human enterprise, work seeks the lowest hierarchical level.
Vail's Axiom
Murphy’s Laws
Work
Hierarchies
No matter what goes wrong, there is always somebody who knew it would.
Evans's and Bjorn's Law
Murphy’s Laws
People
Problems
1. Anything that begins well ends badly. 2. Anything that begins badly ends worse.
Universal Law
Murphy’s Laws
The success of any venture will be helped by prayer, even in the wrong denomination.
Anonymous
Beliefs
Murphy’s Laws
Success
Prayer
Page 86 of 88
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