Murphy’s Laws | Just-One-Liners.com

Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 86)

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.

Austen's First Law

Marriage Men Murphy’s Laws People Wives Jane Austen

Expansion means complexity; and complexity decay.

Parkinson's Third Law

Murphy’s Laws Complexity Expansion

A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.

Gourd's Axiom

Murphy’s Laws Time Meetings

Whenever you need to stop at a light to put on makeup, every light will be green.

Milstead's Driving Principle

Autos Murphy’s Laws traffic lights

The enemy diversion you are ignoring is the main attack.

A Murphy's Military Law

Military Murphy’s Laws

Some people manage by the book, even though they don't know who wrote the book or even what book.

Loftus's Fifth Law of Management

Murphy’s Laws People Management The book

If you can't fix it, feature it.

Last Law of Product Design

Murphy’s Laws Things Products

After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

Lorenz's Law of Mechanical Repair

Murphy’s Laws Situations Grease

Under current practices, both expenditures and revenues rise to meet each other, no matter which one may be in excess.

Bolton's Law of Ascending Budgets

Money Murphy’s Laws Budgets

Class schedules are designed so that every student will have time to waste between classes.

Law of Class Scheduling

Education Murphy’s Laws School Classes

Food that tastes the best has the highest number of calories.

Dieter's Law

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws Calories Taste

Use it or lose it.

Ford’s Commandment

Murphy’s Laws (Henry Ford)

It goes in – it must come out.

Teslacle's Deviant to Fudd's Law

Murphy’s Laws

Those whose approval you seek the most give you the least.

Rozanne Weissman

public relations manager

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws People Approval

Only adults have difficulty with child-proof bottles.

Third Principle for Patients

Health Murphy’s Laws People Adults Child-proof bottles

Successful research attracts the bigger grant which makes further research impossible.

Parkinson's Law of Medical Research

Murphy’s Laws Research grants

The only time suppressive fire works is when it is used on abandoned positions.

Murphy's 11th Military Law

Military Murphy’s Laws War

When you are served a meal aboard an aircraft, the aircraft will encounter turbulence.

Gunter's First Law of Air Travel

Activities Eating Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws Travel Airplanes Turbulence

What is good politics is bad economics; what is bad politics is good economics; what is good economics is bad politics; what is bad economics is good politics.

Baer's Quartet

Government Murphy’s Laws Politics Economics

A meeting lasts at least 1 1/2 hours, however short the agenda.

Parson's Third Law

Murphy’s Laws Time Agendas Meetings

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Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 86)

When our friends get into power, they aren’t our friends any more.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.

Expansion means complexity; and complexity decay.

A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.

Whenever you need to stop at a light to put on makeup, every light will be green.

The enemy diversion you are ignoring is the main attack.

Some people manage by the book, even though they don't know who wrote the book or even what book.

If you can't fix it, feature it.

After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

Under current practices, both expenditures and revenues rise to meet each other, no matter which one may be in excess.

Class schedules are designed so that every student will have time to waste between classes.

Food that tastes the best has the highest number of calories.

Use it or lose it.

It goes in – it must come out.

Those whose approval you seek the most give you the least.

Only adults have difficulty with child-proof bottles.

Successful research attracts the bigger grant which makes further research impossible.

The only time suppressive fire works is when it is used on abandoned positions.

When you are served a meal aboard an aircraft, the aircraft will encounter turbulence.

What is good politics is bad economics; what is bad politics is good economics; what is good economics is bad politics; what is bad economics is good politics.

A meeting lasts at least 1 1/2 hours, however short the agenda.