Murphy’s Laws | Just-One-Liners.com

Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 87)

Short-term success with voters on any side of a given issue can be guaranteed by creating a long-term special study commission made up of at least three divergent interest groups.

Connolly's Rule for Political Incumbents

Elections/Voting Government Murphy’s Laws Politicians Commissions

Everything I like is either illegal, immoral, or fattening.

Alexander Woollcott

(1887 – 1943) theater critic & commentator

Murphy’s Laws Also P. G. Wodehouse

The most powerful force in the world is that of a disc straining to land under a car, just beyond reach.

Laws of the Frisbee

Murphy’s Laws Frisbees

Things are never as bad as they turn out to be.

White’s Law

Murphy’s Laws Problems Situations Richard N. White

Twitter makes you like people you don’t know, and Facebook makes you hate people you do

Shawn’s Observation Shawn Holland

Communication Murphy’s Laws Facebook Shawn Holland Twitter

Always leave room to add an explanation if it doesn't work out.

Rule of the Way Out

Communication Murphy’s Laws Problems Explanations

Never program and drink beer at the same time.

Woltman's Law

Alcohol Beer Computers Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws Things

If a research project is not worth doing at all, it is not worth doing well.

Gordon's First Law

Murphy’s Laws Project

No one is listening until you make a mistake.

Anonymous

Beliefs Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Proverbs Listening

Never drink anything that’s still on fire.

Bartender’s Rule

Alcohol Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

If you’re early, it’ll be cancelled. If you knock yourself out to be on time, you will have to wait. If you’re late, you will be too late.

Luposchainsky's Hurry-Up-And-Wait Principle

Murphy’s Laws Time

If you mess with something long enough, it'll break.

Another Schmidt's Law

Accidents Murphy’s Laws Problems

If anything just cannot go wrong, it will anyway.

Murphy's Fifth Law

Murphy’s Laws Problems

If the assumptions are wrong, the conclusions aren't likely to be very good.

Burns's Balance

Murphy’s Laws Problems Assumptions Conclusions

It won't work.

Jenkinson's Law

Murphy’s Laws

An object at rest will be in the wrong place.

Gerrold's Second Law of Infernal Dynamics

Murphy’s Laws Things Object

Much work, much food; little work, little food; no work, burial at sea.

Cook's Law

Food/Drink Life Murphy’s Laws Work Rules

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humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more

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Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 87)

All life is 6 to 5 against.

The effectiveness of a telephone conversation is in inverse proportion to the time spent on it.

If things were left to chance, they'd be better.

Nobody really cares or understands what anyone else is doing.

Short-term success with voters on any side of a given issue can be guaranteed by creating a long-term special study commission made up of at least three divergent interest groups.

Everything I like is either illegal, immoral, or fattening.

The most powerful force in the world is that of a disc straining to land under a car, just beyond reach.

Things are never as bad as they turn out to be.

Twitter makes you like people you don’t know, and Facebook makes you hate people you do

Always leave room to add an explanation if it doesn't work out.

Never program and drink beer at the same time.

If a research project is not worth doing at all, it is not worth doing well.

No one is listening until you make a mistake.

Never drink anything that’s still on fire.

If you’re early, it’ll be cancelled. If you knock yourself out to be on time, you will have to wait. If you’re late, you will be too late.

If you mess with something long enough, it'll break.

If anything just cannot go wrong, it will anyway.

If the assumptions are wrong, the conclusions aren't likely to be very good.

It won't work.

An object at rest will be in the wrong place.

Much work, much food; little work, little food; no work, burial at sea.