Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 9)

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Any event, once it has occurred, can be made to appear inevitable by a competent historian.

Murphy’s Laws Situations Time

Never try to replicate a successful experiment.

Murphy’s Laws

The stomach expands to accommodate the amount of junk food available.

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

The longer ahead you plan a special event, and the more special it is, the more likely it is to go wrong.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

The number of stones in your boot is directly proportional to the number of hours you have been on the trail.

Activities Murphy’s Laws

The experiment may be considered a success if no more than 50% of the observed measurements must be discarded to obtain a correspondence with theory.

Murphy’s Laws

An enterprise employing more than 1000 people becomes a self-perpetuating empire, creating so much internal work that it no longer needs any contact with the outside world.

Murphy’s Laws

The one course you must take to graduate will not be offered during your last semester.

Education Murphy’s Laws

1. A dirty book is seldom dusty.
2. Any time you get a mouthful of hot soup, the next thing you do will be wrong.
3. How long a minute is, depends on which side of the bathroom door you're on.

Murphy’s Laws

When you arrive at your chosen campsite, it is full.

Activities Murphy’s Laws

It if smells bad and is sticky, it will eventually find its way onto your children or your shoes.

Murphy’s Laws Situations

If you view your problem closely enough, you will recognize yourself as part of the problem.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Self

Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

If you try hard enough you can always manage to boot yourself in the posterior.

Murphy’s Laws Self

The most expensive component is the one that breaks.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

Say no… then negotiate.

Murphy’s Laws

It is the essence of grantsmanship to persuade the foundation executives that it was they who suggested the research project and that you were a belated convert, agreeing reluctantly to all they had proposed.

Murphy’s Laws

The longer the title, the less important the job.

Murphy’s Laws Work

Whenever A annoys or injures B on the pretence of saving or improving X, A is a scoundrel.

Murphy’s Laws

Any plumbing pipes you choose to replace during renovation will prove to be in excellent condition; those you decide to leave in place will be rotten.

Murphy’s Laws

The legibility of a copy is inversely proportional to its importance.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing