Subject: People (Page 114)

Elvis transcends his talent to the point of dispensing with it altogether.

(1945 – ) author, music journalist & cultural critic
People Situations Success

I just don't want to die the same day Castro dies.

(1925 – 2007) humorist & columnist
Death Self

Employees in a hierarchy do not really object to incompetence in their colleagues.

Murphy’s Laws People

Elections are when people find out what politicians stand for, and politicians find out what people will fall for.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Elections/Voting Government People Politicians

A man's face is his autobiography; a woman's face is her work of fiction.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Appearance Men People Women

She’s like an apple turnover that got crushed in a grocery bag on a hot day.

(1947 – ) American author, teacher & social critic
Appearance Insults People

I'm so sick of these men who just talk about themselves… I'm looking for a well-hung mime.

(1964 – ) Canadian stand-up comedian, actress & television host
Body Men Speech

Men love to be thought of as funny… except when they’re in bed.

(1968 – ) American actress & singer
Men Sex TV/Movie Quotes

The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.

(1952 – ) American columnist & author
People Self Situations

The hardest thing to stop is a temporary chairman.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
People Situations

I didn't know her well, but after watching her in action I didn't want to know her well.

(1905 – 1977) American actress
Communication People

If the world were a logical place, men would ride side saddle.

1944) is an American writer & screenwriter
Men People Places World

I play sports…no I don’t… what the f**k?

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Self Sports

You might be a redneck if… your front porch collapses and four dogs git killed.

(1926 – 1998) American country comedian
Animals Dogs People Rednecks

A lifelong friend is one you haven't borrowed money from yet.

(1914 – 1953) Welsh-born poet & writer
Friends Money People

The eyes of Stalin, the voice of Marilyn Monroe.

(1916 – 1996) French statesman & president
People

Everything is more complicated than it looks to most people.

Murphy’s Laws People

In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol… it was the worst 20 minutes of my life.

(1946 – 2005) Irish professional football player
Alcohol People Women

People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they really don't want it.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
People Things

I am a man of my word… and that word is “unreliable.”

(1973 – ) American comedian
Communication Language Self

I like my coffee like I like my women… in a plastic cup.

(1962 – ) English stand-up comedian & actor
People Women