Subject: People (Page 25)

Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.

(1925 – 2005) television host
Democracy Government Individuals President

Latins for Republicans… it’s like roaches for Raid.

(1964 – ) Colombian-American actor, producer, playwright & screenwriter
Government People Politics

It is now quite lawful for a Catholic woman to avoid pregnancy by a resort to mathematics, though she is still forbidden to resort to physics or chemistry.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Beliefs People Religion Sex Women

When I meet a beautiful girl, the first thing I say is 'will you marry me? … the second thing I say is, 'how do you do?”

(1894 – 1967) English heir, New York socialite (married 13 times)
Marriage People Women

It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist
People Self

A man always blames the woman who fooled him, in the same way he blames the door he walks into in the dark.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Men People Women

I’d rather have two girls at seventeen than one at thirty-four.

(1894 – 1956) American radio comedian
Age Girls People Women

You know your girlfriend is too young when she’ll do everything in bed but go upside down because it’s too scary.

(1975 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Age Girlfriends Sex Young

Sadist: A person who is kind to a masochist.

Definitions People Wordplay

Only adults have difficulty with child-proof bottles.

Health Murphy’s Laws People

Outside every thin woman is a fat man trying to get in.

(1928 – ) British journalist, writer & columnist
Appearance Body Fat Men People Sex Women

He called me a ‘rapist’ and a ‘recluse’ … I’m not a recluse.

(1966 – ) American boxing champion
Insults People Self

It does not take a rocket scientist to coach a professional football team, but, of course, I was one of the few who happened to be a rocket scientist.

(1923 – 2001) American football coach
Football Intelligence People Self Sports

Adult: One who has ceased to grow vertically, but not horizontally.

writer
Age Appearance Body People

My mom always said, ‘Men are like linoleum floors. You lay them right, and you can walk on them for 30 years.

(1958 – ) American actress & stand-up comedian
Men People Sex

The only thing I like about rich people is their money.

(1879 – 1964) British politician
Money People Wealth

[George W.] Bush doesn’t know the names of countries, he doesn’t know the names of foreign leaders, he can’t even find the Earth on a globe.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Intelligence People

Most hard-boiled people are half-baked.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Intelligence People

She is such a good friend that she would throw all her acquaintances into the water for the pleasure of fishing them out again.

(1754 – 1838) French prime minister & diplomat
Friends Old People

The realization that it was not people I disliked but children was for me one of those celebrated moments of revelation.

(1922 – 1985) English poet & novelist
People

A signature always reveals a man's character – and sometimes even his name.

(1899 – 1995) humorist
Characteristics People