Subject: People (Page 34)

You can tell he used to be a rancher; he squeezes Republicans like he's milking a cow.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
People

There goes the original good time that’s been had by all.

(1908–1960) British film actress
Insults People

If you can’t hear me, it’s because I’m in parentheses.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
People Self

People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant.

(1958 – ) comedian, actress & television host
Emotions People Self

I have never known anyone worth a damn who wasn't irascible.

(1885 – 1972) expatriate American poet & critic
Characteristics People

I don’t give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication Language People

Everything that goes up must come down; but there comes a time when not everything that's down can come up.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
People Self Sex

Men have a much better time of it than women; for one thing, they marry later, and for another thing, they die earlier.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Marriage Men Women

Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Autos People Places

It's easy to identify people who can't count to ten; they're in front of you in the supermarket express lane.

(1930 – 1977) German teacher
Intelligence People

I think that maybe if women and children were in charge we would get somewhere.

(1894 – 1961) author, cartoonist & humorist
Children People Situations Women

You might be a redneck if… you think Taco Bell is the Mexican Phone Company.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks

A committee is twelve men doing the work of one.

(1932 – 2009) U.S. senator (Massachusetts)
People

You might be a redneck if… your underwear doubles as your bathing suit.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks

How many people does it take to change a searchlight bulb?


People

I think anybody who doesn't think I'm smart enough to handle the job is underestimating.

(1946 – ) 43rd U.S. president
Government Intelligence President Self

If it’s attention you want, don’t get involved with a man during play-off season.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Men People Sports Television

That’s why they’re man’s best friend… ‘cause guys want buddies that are dumber than they are; so do women, but they’ve already got men

(1957 – ) American comedian
Animals Dogs Men People

It is only rarely that one can see in a little boy the promise of a man, but one can almost always see in a little girl the threat of a woman.

(1824 – 1895) French writer
Children Girls People

The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Men People

Liberal: A man with his mind open at both ends.

Beliefs Definitions People