Subject: People (Page 58)

It only takes a room of Americans for the English and Australians to realize how much we have in common.

(1957 – ) English actor, writer, journalist, comedian & film director
Characteristics England People Places

It is a statistical fact that the wicked work harder to reach hell than the righteous do to enter heaven.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
People Work

As you get older, the pickings get slimmer, but the people don't.

(1956 – ) author & movie actress
Age Appearance Body Old People

Sex is God's joke on human beings.

(1908 – 1989) American actress of film, television & theater
Beliefs God People Sex

You might be a redneck if… you have the electronic singing fish in more than three rooms in your house.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks Things

A woman without a man is like a fish needs a bicycle.

(1988 – 1990) Australian writer & politician
Men People Women

Nobody really cares or understands what anyone else is doing.

Murphy’s Laws People

Aborigines: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country.

Definitions People

Women are absolutely equal; they just can't quite lift as much.

(1953 – ) American singer, songwriter, actor, author & radio personality
Men People Women

You might be a redneck if… your grandfather died and left everything to his widow; but she can’t touch it until she's fourteen.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks Relationships

My books are water; those of the great geniuses are wine… (Fortunately) everybody drinks water.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Books Communication Self

There’s nothing wrong with teenagers that reasoning with them won’t aggravate.

(1922 – 2003) author & playwright
People

If God had wanted women to have giant… fake boobs he’d be a lot like my brother.

(1964 – ) American comedian
Appearance Body Women

Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.

(1925 – 2005) television host
Democracy Government Individuals President

Foreigners always spell better than they pronounce.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication People Places

Men have a much better time of it than women; for one thing, they marry later, and for another thing, they die earlier.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Marriage Men Women

To make an enemy, do someone a favor.

Murphy’s Laws People Situations

I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn’t learn something from him.

(1564 – 1642) Italian astronomer, physicist, engineer, philosopher & mathematician
Intelligence People Self

A woman telling her true age is like a buyer confiding his final price to an Armenian rug dealer.

(1913 – 1983) journalist & author
Age People Women

Intellectual: A guy who can keep his mind on a book at a beach.

Definitions People

Making love to a woman is like buying real estate: location, location, location.

comedian, writer, actor & producer
Body Sex Women