Subject: People (Page 68)

Adherent: A follower who has not yet obtained all that he expects to get.

Definitions People

A neurotic is a person who builds a castle in the air; a psychotic is the person who lives in it; a psychiatrist is the one who collects the rent.

(1915 – 2004) American playwright & author
Occupations People Work

When I was ten, my family moved to Downers Grove Illinois; when I was twelve, I found them.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Family Self Situations

You might be a redneck if… you think a "quarter horse" is that ride in front of Kmart.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Animals People Rednecks Things

Information travels more surely to those with a lesser need to know.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws People

The only place a men want depth in a woman is in her [cleavage].

(1917 – 2016) Hungarian-born American actress
Intelligence Men People Women

According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice about a woman is their eyes, and women say the first thing they notice about men is they're a bunch of liars

Men People Women

The only completely consistent people are the dead.

(1894 – 1963) English writer
Death People

Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Intelligence People Stupidity

Fanatic: One who, having lost sight of his goal, redoubles his efforts.

Definitions People

The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!

Intelligence Mind People Self

Women dress alike all over the world: they dress to be annoying to other women.

(1890 – 1973) Italian-French designer
Appearance Clothing People Women

Bureaucrat: A person who cuts red tape sideways. 

Government People

Girls are just friends who give you erections.

(1948 – ) British novelist, screenwriter & playwright
Girls People

It's interesting to speculate how it developed that in two of the most anti-feminist institutions, the church and the law court, the men are wearing the dresses.

(1916 – 2000) American lawyer & activist
Appearance Clothing Law Religion Women

Woman’s influence is powerful, especially when she wants something.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Characteristics Women

Men are brave enough to go to war, but they are not brave enough to get a bikini wax.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Characteristics Men People War

I don’t have a girlfriend but sometimes I like to pretend I do. I just stand in my apartment screaming “No, that’s not what I said!”

(1965 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Girlfriends People Relationships

Somebody stole my identity… good luck using it without the medications.

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian, television writer/producer & radio host
People Self

If you think women are the weaker sex, try pulling the blankets back to your side.

People Women

The only difference between friends and lovers is about four minutes.

writer, website creator
Friends Old People