Subject: People (Page 84)

Alone in a crowd

People

You might be a redneck if… you've been on television more than five times describing what the tornado sounded like.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks

A woman is like a tea bag… you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water.

(1884 – 1962) diplomat & reformer & first lady
People Women

I don’t understand this whole Elvis thing; there are dead people in my family that we miss and love dearly, but shoot, we don’t dress up like them and three are blank.

(1964 – ) American writer, stand-up comedian, actress, television host
People

Nobody ever asks a father how he manages to combine marriage and a career.

(1920 – 2001) American writer & humorist
Marriage Men People Women

Henry Kissinger may be a great writer, but anyone finishes his book is definitely a great reader.

(1952 – ) American writer & biographer
Communication People Reading/Writing

She was what we used to call a suicide blonde—dyed by her own hand.

(1915 – 2005) Canadian writer
Appearance Hair People Women

Even paranoids have enemies.

Murphy’s Laws People

You might be a redneck if… your on your first date you had to ask your dad to borrow the keys to the tractor.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Dating People Rednecks

A homely face and no figure have aided many women heavenward.

(1861 – 1950) American writer
Appearance Body People Women

… there are three sexes – men, women, and clergymen.

(1771 – 1845) English writer & Anglican clergyman
Occupations People

Employees who think they know everything are very irritating to those of us who do.

(1936 – 2005) Irish comedian
People

It only takes a room of Americans for the English and Australians to realize how much we have in common.

(1957 – ) English actor, writer, journalist, comedian & film director
Characteristics England People Places

Women are cursed, and men are the proof.

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Men People Women

What makes resisting temptation difficult for many people is they don't want to discourage it completely.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
Characteristics People Situations

A woman who strives to be like a man lacks ambition.

Characteristics Men People Women

The average man thinks about sex every… what were we talking about?

(1964 – ) American comedian
Men People Sex

Intellectual: A guy who can keep his mind on a book at a beach.

Definitions People

The optimist invents the airplane and the pessimist the parachute.

(1890 – 1973) English writer & critic
Characteristics People

Life is strange; every so often a good man wins.

(1902 – 1963) Danish actor
Characteristics Individuals Life People Success

Nobody believes the official spokesman… but everybody trusts an unidentified source.

(1934 – ) American White House Press Secretary for President Gerald Ford
People